Full Moon Ramblings

Last night was a full moon. In fact it was a SUPER full moon and when I looked online to make sure that it really was going to be a full moon last night I found out that it was also called the Full Corn Planting Moon and/or the Full Milk Moon. Why? I don't know, I didn't feel like doing a full on research on why, but it was nice to know that the beautiful moon that I saw last night had some pretty cool names...coz my days, it was a beautiful moon.

A picture I took last night enjoying the full moon.

When I was a little girl, I used to open up my window and it had a perfect view of the moon, at whatever phase it was at...and I would "talk to the moon" because I was taught that you had to "talk to God"...but I didn't really know how. All I know was that God was "up there" and at night whenever I looked "up there" I saw the moon. So at an early age, it was always me talking to moon hoping that somehow my words were also traveling "up there" to God. Also, it was a good visual for me...I wasn't just talking into space or something...I was talking to the moon and praying that it was somehow reaching God's ears. I know now that it was and has and will always be. But the moon holds a lot of sentiment to me.

The past few weeks have been tough, no doubt for everyone, but my feelings are valid, too. Sometimes it's easier for me to be strong for those who need me to be strong for them when they can't be strong themselves...but for some reason, for as long as I can remember, it has hard for me to allow someone to be strong for me. I somehow feel like I don't deserve it or something...but you know what, I'm slowly getting there. Trusting people more. But last night, as I was sat waiting for the moon to pop up out from all the clouds, I was zooming down memory lane and remembering all the secrets I would "tell" the moon...and I miss doing that.

I journal. I blog. I do have my friends that I talk to, however those nightly moments when I use to voice my thoughts to the moon, was so pure and so heartfelt. And that's what I did last night. I talk and talk and talked and realized that wow, that was something I really needed. I makes me smile to know that that same moon that I saw last night is the same moon that was there for me when I needed to talk all those years ago. I don't even know why I stopped. 

I love the ocean. I love the mysteries that it holds and I can watch documentaries of the wonders of the ocean for hours and hours and (if only I still had internet connection!) I could even let it play for a long time in the background of my daily life whenever I was home. But what also fascinates me is the cosmos. The heavens. The sky. I am a self-claimed sunrise chaser. (Mind you, I am by far a morning person...there IS a difference!) I can cloud watch, star gaze and meteor showers amaze me. I look for those wishing stars and I smile when I can recognize certain constellations. Whenever I can see a planet my heart beats a bit faster and when I spot a satellite passing overhead, it makes me smile. 

Nature is my inspiration. Yes, I hear that all the time. What inspires you? Nature. But it is so true. I can not even imagine life with out nature. And my heart fills up with so much happiness when I realize that there is a creator (God) that made all that...FOR ME. For everyone, yes...but I like to think that He took His time with certain things...a lot of things, really...because He know that it would make one of His children smile...me. At least that is MY belief. 

Yes, the times right now are uncertain. Yes, the times right now are tough, and sometimes...well, a lot of times, I just feel why?! What's the point? But I know, I know that there is an end. And no matter how lonely I feel, no matter how I feel like I'm alone in my struggles, no matter how tough it all is...the moon and the sun will always rise and fall, no matter who is watching it...it just does. And the God who created them loved me enough to know...that in my darkness, I would need light. And my heart is filled one more time.

The full moon over the Olomanas.

Random Thoughts

Wow, so that was close! This whole week the whole of Hawai’i was living in anticipation of Hurricane Lane. Just last night it was reported that it took a hard turn left at the last possible second and is just missing us here in Oahu. Wow, prayers really do work. Not that I had any doubt that it would…but it just goes on to prove that with a lot of prayer and a lot of faith, miracles can happen. Now I am not trying to preach that everything will be solved through prayer or something…I know that there are times where you pray and pray for something to happen and then the opposite happens.

I have been reeling from that these past couple of days…more like months. This year, so far, has been an eye-opening one for me. Starting from the very beginning but more so in the month of May. It is only just now that things FEEL like they are finally settling down…but no lie, I still come home feeling exhausted from the persona I am trying to keep up. The persona that I am okay when I’m really not. Oh okay, now I am being a bit dramatic. I know that I am okay…I know that I WILL be okay…but something is missing…and I know what that is.

You know how there are moments in your life where you are just comfortable. Where you are just cruising and just staying under the radar living your life…and then something happens that shakes you. It starts out small and then it just escalates faster and faster until you feel like you are just going to burst because that cocoon that you so painstakingly built to protect your heart breaks and it’s just through shear strength and will-power that you just continue on telling yourself that you are NOT ALLOWED TO GIVE UP. Yes, that is me.

What is anchoring me right now is my job. Although several things at my job has changed (and they were not small changes either), I have confidence in my teaching abilities that it is the one thing that is constant while my personal life is in the middle of an earthquake. This was the first year that I wasn’t super nervous on the first day of school or at open house…and I think the reason why is because I have been teaching long enough to know that it’s going to be okay. My life is going topsy-turvy, but my classroom is my anchor. Not only that, but my love for teaching and the passion to reach these children coupled with the trust that the parents are giving me gives me the strength to tackle my shifting ground. I don’t know if that makes any sense right now…but all I know is that it’s my job as a teacher that is saving me right now. (Which is another reason why I will always strongly encourage you to find a job that you love and are passionate about.)

Yes, the news of this Hurricane fast approaching was scary…but the most I was worried about was the fact that I wasn’t all too scared. I was worried…because I did have my craft room outside in the open and I didn’t want all my stuff to blow away, but I was also not that worried. Did I prepare for this impending doom? Yes, I had filled all my water bottles up with filtered water and several jars of water as well sit on my counter…just in-case. I am only one person, so I knew I didn’t need that much food…and so I didn’t go all out stocking on food. But I also knew that for the most part I was going to be safe. In all that was going on in my life…it couldn’t get that much worse. I mean, this year started out with a warning that a “ballistic missile was on it’s way to Hawai’i…THIS IS NOT A DRILL”…like I said, it could be a lot worse.

I am NOT brushing the fact that hurricanes can do a lot of damage. Big Island got hit hard and so did Maui…so my thoughts and prayers go out to them. And if the hurricane did come…it would have been real bad, so I am very thankful that it just missed us. Very thankful. 

But I had a lot of time by myself, contemplating life. School was called off Thursday and Friday to prepare for the hurricane and to stay safe…in those two days I was able to 90% finish unpacking my things in my studio and get things where I wanted them to go. I was also able to catch up on some reading, letter writing, blog posting, and sleep (if only my craft room was set up and my paints where out, that was what I had wanted to do!)…but I was also doing some soul searching.

As I was thinking about life and trying to make some sense of it…I realized there was a prayer answered that I never even thougth to pray. Well, in a way I did…I always pray to stay safe…and God made me realize in one way that He was looking out. I use to live next to the beach. I mean, it was right there where I could sleep to the crashing of the waves…but things happened and I chose to move towards the mountains. If I was living where I was living when this hurricane scare happened, things would have been pandemonium. Although the place was a place that I needed when I needed it, it was not the most secure place. It was in an older house,  right next to the beach. My windows were stuck in the open position and the walls where water soaked. Mold was growing from the ceiling because of a leak in the roof and each day the walls were closing in on me. It was tiny. Earlier this year we had a pretty bad storm and my whole room got soaking wet. Since I wasn’t able to close the windows, a lot of my things from wall to wall got soaked and the wall looked like it was going to crash any minute from the water load it was accumulating...all that from just a storm...now a hurricane...hmmm. So, it was good that I moved. I do miss being able to go to the beach a walk down the driveway…but where I am now I am so much more happier. It’s secluded and secure. I feel safe here and I just feel like it’s a better fit for me overall.

So even though I know some people don’t like the phrase, “Everything happens for a reason” comes to mind at times like this. Sometimes it might not be for a good reason, sometimes we won’t see that reason until years and years down the road…and even other times where you won’t ever see the reason in your lifetime…but everything does happen for a reason.

The hurricane didn’t hit…it downgraded to a tropical storm…but I have yet to experience anything other than some “normal” showers and wind.  I do pray for those that did get hit and I do pray for Big Island, Maui and all those little island that were hit, but I also pray for me…for me to find that inner strength to carry on without having to “fake it until I make it.”

Early morning Hawaiian Sunrise PC: myself

Hello March

Hello March! I can't believe how fast this year is going! I seriously feel like I blinked and 1/4 of the year past! But Christmas break is long gone and I have survived this far...and I am so looking forward to Spring break in a week or so!

Work/School is going...going...going...well. I have finally gotten all the keiki where I wished that they could have been 2-4 weeks from the beginning of the school year. I think this is the first time I have worked with the younger 2..some starting on their birthday. And I have to say that it was rather difficult (with this age group) when a child started, since all they would do is cry, cry cry. And when I finally got that child settled, another child would start at a later date, and the whole crying process would start all over again. Which is what happened this year. I had children starting as late as November...and another one that started this past FEBRUARY! It was hard only because the whole dynamics changed in the class and I had to work real hard to get it back to where the children were wanting to learn, instead of trying to grasp to the newness of something...new. But wow, I made it...and I am still loving it, that's for sure! I love my keiki; I love what I do. I love getting to know each child individually and as a group. Each year is different...my goodness, each DAY is different and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Now to only try to get the children to stay home when they are sick! I feel like this is a constant battle among teachers...sick children coming to school...spreading their sickness...irritated parents from hearing other children sick and coughing in their child's face...and then having to deal with that as a teacher...who feels like she is now sick from all the sickness spreading around the school. I have never had this many children "allergic" to something. The "reason" why the children come to school with runny noses, coughing, drippy eyes, and a lethargic behavior. "They're not contagious- it's just allergies." But they are STILL leaving a trail of mucus and whatnot where ever they go! But what do I know? They probably do have allergies...

But enough with that. I love my keiki...and I love my class. I love the spontaneous aura I have in my class...the whole "no two days are a like" is so my class. Working with two-year olds is so rewarding because I have the privilege of seeing so much develop in such a short amount of time! A lot of my keiki started not talking...(or speaking in gibberish or "minion-talk"), and now we can talk story for days...and I actually can understand them! I love hearing their thought process, the why of life, and the reason for anything under the sun! I love watching their confidence and self-esteem grow stronger each day and I love seeing "my" little ones start developing ohana feelings for their classmates and for myself. Their attention span is improving...they all love art...and dancing is a must in my class. We have these wonderful impromptu dance/karaoke sessions in my class...and I tell the little ones that as long as they are singing "anything can be a music instrument." They are getting to know the rules to that though...PEOPLE are not drums...and neither are fish tanks. And their little voices singing is so endearing to me! I love how they are in a habit of singing most anything. I love hearing them make up their own lyrics and dancing to their own beat! And I am very impressed with their "clean-up" skills and how they are using their words. They are always game to trying out new things for artwork, exercise movement, activity, and/or circle time.

I was real impressed the other day when we talking about the alphabet. At this age, I don't normally try to teach them letters (we are a more social/behavioral school)...but since our topic for this month is music and literature, I try to introduce to them a letter a day and of course I started with the letter "A." I was telling them that "A" is for alligator and had plans to read the book "There's an Alligator Under My Bed" by Mercer Mayer, pretend we were alligators, had an alligator artwork ready for them...the whole she-bang. But as I drew the letter on the board and said "Okay my friends, "A" is for alligator"...I had a little boy speak up and say, "Aunty, "A" is for Aloha." And he couldn't have been more right! :) We do sing that song:

"A" is for Aloha ("A" is for Aloha)

"L" is for Love ("L" is for Love)

"O" is for Ohana

"H" is for Hawai'i

ALOHA, ALOHA

so, of course...it made my heart smile.



It has been cold, cold, cold lately and a few weeks ago it rained so hard, I thought I was going to get stuck! Where I live there is only one way out on a bridge. If the ocean rises enough from all the rain and floods the bridge (which I am told that it has happened!) Then I guess it's good that I'm so comfortable swimming in the ocean to get to the other side! *laughs* Nah, I have my friends who have boards and boats that could probably get me, OR I just stayed on my side of the bridge and did some artsy stuff while listening to the steady flow of the rain! And since rain doesn't bother me so much, I did walk down to the beach and sat at the shoreline for a bit. I love watching all the moods of the beautiful ocean. Right now it is saying that it is 68degrees. Cold, super cold for Hawai'i. But then then again where my sister lives, I feel like it is much colder than where I would normally be at this moment. At home.

Now, that is another long story. But for short...the heavy rains drove the critters out of their homes and so I have been finding a lot of RATS (which I first thought were mice, but was wrong!) INSIDE MY STUDIO. So until they cease to enter my place I have moved out of my beloved studio and have come to live with my sister for the time being. I do go back to my place every morning to get ready for work and after work I stop by before come here to my sister's only because my landlady is still there (for some reason the rats are finding their way into my studio, but apparently not here house) and I go there to check up on her and make sure she is okay and of course, my fish. I have 6 aquariums with my darling fish, and I have to feed them and make sure to do their water changes when needed. But is has been tiring to say the least. The whole back and forth, back and forth of it all. I am so grateful for my sister and her family for allowing me to stay with them, but I also really, really miss my own space and home. Plus, I feel like it's a LOT colder where my sister live...but it's always so good to be with family. :)

My family is growing...and I couldn't be more happy about that! In the past couple of months I have gained several nieces and nephews some whom I haven't yet met, but still love so very much! My best friend had her baby and I am so looking forward to seeing him in a couple months! All these babies are making me smile! I am so happy that I work at a preschool, because watching the new generation grow and develop is such an awesome feeling! I love being a part of a child's life, helping them learn the skills to get along in life...and just watching their personalities shape into who they are. But my family is everything to me; I love them. I love them all! :)



My family makes me feel blessed and loved. I feel like that there is no stronger bond (other than God's love for us!) than a family bond. I also feel like people can choose who is in their family...so I believe that friends can also be family to you.



I have always loved to paint. That doesn't mean that I am any good by far! But I am choosing to get better so I am doing it more. I love to paint with acrylics, but now I am venturing out of my comfort zone and trying to watercolor paint. So. Much. Different! Wow, it's so different! I like it though. I feel as if it's more soft and challenging. Don't get me wrong painting with acrylics is not an easy thing, but because I don't paint watercolor painting as much it's more of a challenge for me. Lately these "galaxy watercolor" paintings have catching my eye and so I wanted to try them out myself. They are so beautiful and so I tried my hand at it, and even though it looked easier enough to do, it was harder...well, more different than what I was used to. I am also loving all these creative quotes! I made a few of these round galaxy with quotes in them and I have given a few of them out to share. They are a lot of fun to made and look at !



Another thing I have been trying is the pointed pen. Wow, that is fun! I love writing with the pointed pen. I have to hold myself back from buying all the supplies for the pointed pen! I actually have a few material for the pointed pen but when I got the tools that I needed from a new subscription box that I subscribe to (The Inky Box-mini). My sister actually gifted me a 3-month subscription to this box and I couldn't be more happier with it! I might have to continue with this subscription because it introduces me to new ways to letter that I haven't even thought about it! With the pointed pen it's a lot different than the brush pen that I am used to. I like that pointed pen because it does force me to slow down and really thing about each stroke of the pen.



Every day I am trying to post something up on Instagram that makes up my life. Whether that be some lettering that I've done, some artwork that I've painted, my fish (I love to aquascape their homes!), some book I've read, a place that I visited/travelled to, a view that that made me smile, my current planner moment, one of my journal entries...something...anything. It's always fun to look back to see what I've done and it's also a fun way to meet people and get inspiration and tips and other things. (Feel free to follow me! @mylife_oceanstorm)



Before I forget, I wanted to mentioned that in the beginning of the year a celebration of life was held for Legend. I had so many emotions as I was a part of this amazing event. Saddness all around, but happiness and awe to see just how many peoples lives were touched by the 3 life-filled years of this young, precious boy. My friend was able to get this picture of while we were walking back to my place after the event. There were so many people who were brought together to support and encourage and grieve with Legend's parents and sisters. I consider myself blessed to have known this young boy who was taken from us too soon. Legend, my you rest in peace, little one. Can't wait to see you again one day!



Well, hopefully I can be more consistent with my blog entries.  I miss writing them...so I will try my best to find time to write. If not, I will be back...one day. :)

"I can't go back to yesterday because I was a

different person then."

-Lewis Carroll

Alice in Wonderland

Please check me out and follow me on IG: @mylife_oceanstorm

A Ramble of Randoms

When December first started, I thought I had prepared myself for all the busy-ness that was going to happen. Well, I learned one thing [again...every year! I guess it's something I will never really "learn"!] you can't really plan out your end-of-the-year months! The only thing that you can really plan for these months is...crazy. I should just put that in my planner..."Today: Crazy"...*laughs* But no joke, it's been one hell of a ride this month. And it's not even over yet...but I have a few moments to write. I seriously have been meaning to write more in my blog...keep it more up-to-date, but it's more of, "when I get the chance to write, I'll write!"

I don't even know where to start. One person that is on my mind right now is Legend. I know I'm going to cry writing about this, but writing has always been therapeutic for me and I don't ever want him to be forgotten. And "they" say if you write about something/someone they will be immortalized forever. And Legend, you will never be forgotten...like that can even happen in my lifetime, at least.

Legend lived a few short wonderful 3 years. He was a child at my preschool and he was more a quiet one. He loved his skateboard, his shark backpack, his giraffe and his teacher, Mrs. A. He would nap in my classroom at times and he had "his spot" where he would want his bed to be and he was very particular about how it was set up. He had the tiniest shark backpack (which had to face him while he napped) that somehow his mom would miraculously fit 2+ blankets in with a random assortment of special things (one time it was blue party napkins another time his finger skateboards...it was a surprise every time). After nap time he would asked me to help him put his blanket away and as hard as we would try we rarely could fit his blankets in his tiny backpack the way his mom did. He was his teacher's opihi, always having an eye on her and/or always holding onto her somehow...holding her hand, her shirt, her leg.

He would come in my room and dance. His classroom is right next to mine and we have a "secret door" (that isn't so secret since Mrs. A and I like to keep it open during class hours)...and whenever we had music playing (which is all the time) and my class had another of it's many impromptu dance parties, Mrs. A's students would hear and poke their head in my class and join us. At first he would be hesitant to dance, and then he would warm up and you can see him jumping, spinning, holding hands, and twirling with the other kids.

Every morning he would call out, "Hello Ms. Charity" and give me a huge smile all the while clinging onto Mrs. A and whatever toy (most times his giraffe) he had brought with him that day. He was a beautiful boy with a beautiful soul...who unfortunately was born with a rare birth defect that went unnoticed until it was too late. Less than a week ago on December 23 his mom wrote, "Legend was born with a rare birth defect none of us knew about. He had a tangle of arteries and veins in his brain stem which caused his brain to hemorrhage. There was no surgery they could do because of the location so they tried their very, very best to stabilize him, unfortunately they were unsuccessful and he went to fly up to heaven." He was and is very much loved by his family. His sisters doted on him and his family is so close knit.

Legend, you will be very much missed by all those you touched. I will miss you.

Wow, that was hard to write.



I am glad that I am on winter break. More time at the beach for me! I still value my early mornings at the shoreline just watching the sunrise. Since it is winter break, there are a lot more people at the beach when I go. A lot more people with their cameras set up to catch the sun rising over the horizon. And I go pretty early as well. It's always confusing though...it's like the sun has a mind of it's own...there are times where I'll go to the beach at 6:30 and it's still super dark...and other times I'll go at that time and the sun is already up...well, not fully up, but up enough!

It's been too cold to swim in the water, but I will still walk the shoreline with my feet in the water...the ocean water is so healing! I can read all day at the beach...but like I said, since it's winter break, more people...so it's not as calming. But that's okay...everyday is still a beach day to me!



Christmas this year was HOT HOT HOT! We all went to my brother's house to celebrate and one of the first things I said to them was "My days, it's hot!" But the next day, it rained like the ocean was falling out of the sky! You can't really see here, but this is what it looked like right outside my front door. And it was like a waterfall coming down the roof...and I am right by the drain cannal to the sea...and it was like a river rushing by! I love the sound...and if you ever want the beach to yourself...this is the time to go. Not as much people there...and the ocean is a different kind of beautiful! I am so glad that the power didn't go out though! (Although I do enjoy lighting a scented candle when I'm home!)

Well, I decided to change up my fish tank: TankTown. For the longest time I wanted everything (as much everything as I can) to be natural. TankTown (my 35 gallon fish tank) had blue and green marble as "gravel" and treated coral with small kine live plants on them. I wanted it to be a more natural look with driftwood and more plants...so I redid the tank...and I feel like my fish are much more happier!



I had to use a rubber band to hold the plants down until they settle and take roots...should be in a few weeks. But I can't wait until I can remove them! I still like the coral in the tank...but I added a few pieces of drift wood. Changed out the marble completely with a more finer, natural looking gravel and added more plants.



My favorite aquarium plant is the anubias...even though they are slow growing...I like the look of it and once they are established...they look real nice! Plus, when they get bigger you can propagate it! I also added some java fern and water ferns. More bubblers as well and, of course, lots of marimo moss balls (which I also love and have them in all my tanks!) It looks as though my fish are more active and I love watching them explore around the tank and swim up and down and through the bubblers that I placed around the tank. (You can't see the bubblers that I added in the tank since I took this picture before I added the bubblers.)

Oh, and I can't forget! I added another betta fish to my growing fish family!



Meet Mr.Glorious. I met and adopted him while at my favorite LFS. I was there to buy more Zebra Danios for TankTown and I saw him there...and I was thought to myself "what glorious fish!" and I couldn't pass him up! I was meaning to get another betta anyways...and so I did. No, this is not the tank that I have him in anymore. I just put him in there as I prepared his home tank. I wanted him out of his tiny little container that I got him in; he is currently my most active betta fish! I can see him swimming around happily in his tank and exploring his cave and other live plants that I placed in there with him. You can't really tell in the picture but he has a gorgeous, iridescent blue body with transparent black fins and tail. And I think he's quite glorious.

I also brought Mr. Blueberry home from school since he wasn't looking too hot there. Plus, three other betta fish died in different classrooms within two days at the school...and I am not chancing anything with Mr. Blueberry. He was starting to become real lethargic and unmoving while in the classroom...and since he's been home with me he has been swimming around like his old self again. I'm not quite sure what happened in school...but he's going to stay with me for the time being.

On to some exciting baby news! My cousin had her baby, my (sister's) sis-in-law had her baby, and my best friend had her baby! All on the mainland, so I'm super bummed about that...but I'm so excited for them! My cousin and my (sister's) sis-in-law had their baby on my mom's birthday (December 19)...so that was a wonderful birthday surprise and my bestie had her baby a few days ago on the 26th!



My sis-in-law is beautifully pregnant and I get a wonderful happy feeling when I feel Baby PeachNectarine (DollGirl nicknamed her!) kick and move! She had her very successful baby shower and since we all love our tea time, the theme was a "Tea for 3" theme. After our Christmas celebration at their house, all the men got together and cleared out the baby room and put together their baby crib...and I am getting SUPER excited!

And, of course, my adorable baby niece, RocketGirl (who makes 6 months this month) has everyone's attention for the moment! I think that it's so cool that her and her cousin will less than a year apart! And oh my goodness, look at her, she has discovered her toes!

This year for my preschool children's Christmas present for their parents, I decided to do something "easier and faster"...since I knew that a good portion of the children in my class would only be here for a few days before traveling for the holidays. I showed them several projects and the one that they chose to do was the mistle-"toes" feet painting!



I laugh at this because we had just did a paint activity where we went outside and allowed my children to paint their feet and dance on the bike path and grass. And now they think it's the coolest thing to do...paint with your feet! So, of course, they had to choose the painting feet project! I loved hearing them giggle as I painted their feet! We added glitter and laminated it so that it would last longer (and be easier to frame)!



And every year as gift tags I always do the hand print Christmas mitten. I'm real big on saving those tiny handprints and footprint of the children and so I'm glad that they chose the feet mistletoe project. I hope the parents liked it as much as the children did when they saw the final product. They even decorated their own wrapping/envelope for their parents!

Oh, and how can I possible forget?! I went to the Nutcracker ballet this year with two of my friends!



It was a lot of fun to dress up and go with friends. I remember seeing the Nutcracker when I was younger and this one was a little bit different from the one that I remember when I was younger since the one that went to had a Hawai'ian take to it! I should have paid more attention to that because I was quite confused when the turtles and clownfish came out to dance!



But it was beautifully done and I feared to blink my eyes else I might miss something! The Cavalier in Act II: A Lush Tropical Garden was amazing...but everyone EVERYONE did such a breath-taking job! One of the persons that I went with happens to also be my school boss and classroom aid...and then next day in school during our impromptu dance parties you can bet your bottom dollar we were doing our various of ballet dancing with the children! It was an amazing event and I am so glad that I went this year!

Well, enough ramblings for now...I must go and do some productive things today! But here is one more beautiful picture of my favorite beach...doesn't it make you just want to lay down on the powder soft sand and cloud watch to nature's musical sound of the waves bubbling on the shore?!

Quotes that describe me.

 I have been debating whether or not to write and post this, however I figured that this is who I am. I have accepted who I am and even though at times I still feel like I'm falling under, I can always find the strength to keep going and I choose everyday to be happy. So with that said, here are six quotes that hit home for me.

1. "You will never be completely at home again, because part of your heart will always be elsewhere. That is the price you pay for the richness of loving and knowing people in more than one place."-anonymous

 When I was younger, I traveled a lot. I love traveling, I still do, but I don't as much now. But one thing that I have always had a hard time with is saying goodbye. I hate goodbyes. They were always so hard for me because I couldn't just give some of me, I give my all when I call someone family. When I first moved here to Hawai'i, I purposely didn't make any friends because I didn't want to get close to someone, especially since I didn't know if I was going to stay here for that long. When I went to school abroad, I made so many wonderful friends that I've gotten super close with...and when It was time to say goodbye, it was hard. And it's hard now when I talk to them knowing that it will never be how it was before. But this quote hits home for me because if that saying goes, "home is where the heart is" and my heart is all over the place...then where is home?

2. "The older I get, the more I realize the value of privacy, of cultivating your circle and only letting certain people in. You can be open, honest, and real while still understanding not everyone deserves a seat at the table of your life." -WomenWorking(dot)com.

 Yes. This quote. I remember when I was younger I had a lot of people that I considered my friend. I use to tell people that "everyone is my friend, I just haven't met them all yet!" Now that I'm older, I sing a different tune. I want to say that I will always and forever be nice to everyone--whether I like them or not--no matter what. But even if I am nice to you, that does not mean you deserve "a seat at the table of [my]life."

3. "Mean people don't bother me a bit. Mean people who disguise themselves as nice people bother me a whole lot." -article from Tara Ziegmont.

Fake people. Why?! Why be fake?! Why be someone you are not?! Mean people are backstabbers...and backstabbers bother me a lot. A whole lot. 

4. "Even if we never talk again after this day, please remember that I am forever changed by who you are and what you meant to me."-anonymous

In ways, this quote really hits my heart. I can say that this quote relates to several people in my life--People that I have decided to cut out of my life (but I will still be nice to if ever our paths cross--highly unlikely though), and other people who have just faded out of my life...until I don't even remember when the last time we talked was. 

5. "You know? Yes, I changed. I'm not as nice as i used to be, because I don'tw ant to get used or walked over. I don't trust everyone and tell them my secrets, because behind every fake smile there's a backstabber. I distance myself from people because in the end they're only going to leave. I have changed because I have realized that I'm only the person I can depend on."-anonymous

I know I've changed. I know that as people grow older, they grow wiser and reality hits. Well, for most people this happens and yes, it has happen to me. I am sick of getting walked over, so I limit the people I call family/friends...because real family/friends won't do you like that. I am also broken from people leaving me, and I'm tired of running, so I just close myself. Don't get me wrong, I will always be nice, but I still through up those walls.

6. "Let me tell you this: if you meet a loner, no matter what they tell you, it's not because they enjoy solitude. It's because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them."-anonymous

I don't think I have to even explain this one. I will say this, there was one time in my life were people would call me an extrovert...but now I am more introverted. Read this quote; understand this quote; and you might understand me a little bit more.
 

1st of the last month.

It is hard to believe that it is the first of the last month of this year! Thirty-one days [well, technically only 30 more days!] and this year will be over and a new one will start. This was a good year. It was filled with "first times," home visits, new things, sadness, happiness, and so many other things...but I think the thing that I will remember the most about this year is the fact that I was able to step out of my comfort zone more often than not.

I decided that I wanted to explore more and so I did. I went to different islands to seek new adventures, and I also explored my own island ore. I threw myself into work more...I have always loved my work, so that hasn't changed, but I decided to try new things and found out that I liked it! I am proud of this year. I know that there were down times and times where I just didn't have the motivation to keep going, but the fact that I am writing this now shows that I am stronger than I believed that I was an kept going.

I lived my life with purpose and those times where motivation was low, I kept going because I know that life is a gift and not everyone can live life. I pushed myself through trials telling myself that things will get better...and it. I don't think that I am where I am suppose to be right now, but I can sure as hell say that I am not stopping until I get "there!" Well, here's to the 1st day of the last day of the year. These next 30 days will be exiting, no doubt...but I will leave this year feeling accomplished and happy that I survived and lived. :)

Soul Place.

"Did you know that we all have at least one soul place in the physical world? A soul place is a special site or spot where we experience unique feelings of belonging, empowerment and energetic rejuvenation."

When I read that quote a few days ago, I knew right away where my soul place was. Here. This place right here. It's like my own entrance to the ocean. I come to this place to recharge when life happens And life does happen; it gets crazy, hectic, exciting and wild...and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I came here today to refocus. It was a really long week and there were times where I thought that I wouldn't make it. But no matter what I know that I am strong enough to never give up. But it's when I come here and I am able to just taking in the healing powers of this awesome place that I feel like it's going to be okay...well, eventually. Life happens, and you just have to "roll with the punches" and get through the tough times, because i choose to make my life worth it. Even if it doesn't always seem that way.

As I was watching the ways come in and out and in and out I was thinking of that one quote, "There is nothing more beautiful than the way the ocean refuses to stop kissing the shore line no matter how many ties it is sent away." The waves kept coming and each time it ran up the shore it created beautiful lines and smoothed out the sand. It's so mesmerizing to watch. If the waves won't give up, I won't give up. Plus, who am I do deny myself a chance to swim in the ocean? If I give up, I wouldn't be able to do that anymore.

The ocean calls to me, but not in that creepy way, but more in a way that it reminds me that my Creator had the amazing idea to create the ocean knowing that it would help people like me get through life. I like that think that God smiled when he made the ocean with all the amazing wonders in it because it was just beautiful. The ocean reminds me that I matter...I am so small standing beside it, but God still continues to make wondrous things happen because it makes me smile.

But this is my soul place...a place where I can regather my thoughts and my strength to keep going. I hope that I never take this place for granted. It's an amazing place to have.

Maui 2016.

I am back from my amazing vacation on the beautiful Hawai'ian island of Maui! Although I am so happy to be back, I am a little sad that it's over. I was so fun to have my family and friends with me...and I'm always a little sad when the time comes to say goodbye. I suck at goodbyes. That one quote by Winnie the Pooh always makes it so bittersweet. "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard."

Well, I am so happy that I am a journal keeper and so I will write excerpts from my daily journal of the things that we did on Maui on a day-by-day timeline. I will try my best to limit the pictures...but oh my, I will try! :)

*Day 1: September 17*

I left my sister's house at 7:15am to head to airport and my sister and I decided to switch seats so that she could have some alone time to just relax since she had a very busy week. My sister and her family and I were heading to Maui from Oahu...everyone else was coming from the mainland. Our flight was a whooping 43 minutes and I sat with my brother-in-law and my DollGirl and KaiBoy.

I was pretty proud of myself for not packing along of things since I knew that I was basically going ot live in my swimwear and coverup and I just brought neutral colored casual/sun dresses.

My sister's family luggage was a bit more than mine! But that's okay because she likes to come WELL prepared! :)

For the majority of our week stay we stayed in the beautiful condos of 'Aina Nalu in Lahaina. It was directly across the street from the Seventh-day Adventist Church there, so that was a nice surprise! :)

"Wow! Talk about windy! I decided to wear a dress and it was super windy! The sucky part is that the wind was not even cold! It as super hot! So it's hot and super muggy" Since it's hurricane season it has been crazy weather...even here in Maui! The water is super brown and the waves are wow messy! But the place that we are staying at is so beautiful! I love this condo and that we are staying here! I wish so bad that I could have a place like this, even if it were just one room [the condo had two rooms]."

And yes, as soon as we settled we walked to this a yummy cafe called The Cool Cat and ate dinner and then yes, we decided to take a night swim in the salt water eternity pool to wait for the rest of our group to come. :)

*Day 2: September 18*

In the morning we ended up going to the continental breakfast where this lady also was telling us about different tours and activities that we could do on the island. She ended up having a raffle drawing for some awesome prizes. Since we had rented out two rooms, we were able to get to raffle tickets in the "bucket" and guess whose TWO raffle tickets won?! Yep! We did! So for one of the prizes we decided to get a a free pass to the Maui Ocean Center. After breakfast, we swam again in the pool, had lunch and the little kiddos took their nap and as soon as they woke up we all made our way to the Maui Ocean Center!

KaiBoy's fascination with the fish and the aquarium as a whole warmed my heart! He was so interested in everything I loved watching him as he took in all the beautiful life of the ocean! His reaction to everything was everything my inner child was feeling! :)

The beautiful hono was sooo amazing to see! I see sea turtles a lot when I am swimming in the ocean...and I am always blown away with how beautiful and graceful they are!

  "I really liked the aquarium and i think that I would go there again. I did read that itwas the in the top 25 best aquariums in the US. I am glad that I had the opportunity to go. I believe tomorrow we are going zip limming!! But today was awesome!"

*Day 3: September 19*

I shared rooms with DollGirl and I felt bad for leaving her before she woke up. That little girl is a hurricane sleeper! My goodness, but she also loves to cuddle when she sleeps...and I felt bad for leaving her. But we left the condos at 6:30 to head to the north shore to go ZIP LINING! I have always wanted to go zip lining and I was so happy that we had the chance to go!

   

 

Our guides said that we would reach 50 mph! It was AMAZING! :) I am so glad that I didn't have any fear of heights though because we did a lot of climb up tall trees, scary movable ladders and bridges! But I would SO do it again! I loved it and I had so much fun!

My sister and her brother-in-law ended up not going and so we met them at this really yummy restaurant called Da Kitchen and they had amazing food!

 

 

Check out all the different kind of "Loco Mocos" and since we all know that I love loco moco's I decided to try the Kanak Attack Combo Moco. I couldn't even finish 1/4 of it! It was so much! I ended up taking it home and was able to make 3 other meals of it! I shared it of course! But I think in the future, I will only like my regular loco moco! Too much food touching...:)

*Day 4: September 20*

Today we wanted to explore the beaches...so we drove around to a couple of beaches before we settled on one that didn't have [too much] brown water. 

It was actually a really nice beach and we were able to swim out and it had a fast drop, so we had to make sure the kids stayed away from the ocean's edge. I know that my DollGirl and KaiBoy are water babies and they will just run in before you can even blink and eye! But DollGirl was able to go out and snorkel with us for the first time! And I loved the fact that she loved it! It was a super beautiful day!

"I sure do love to snorkel! If you swam out past the dead coral closer to shore, there were amazingly, bright coral and just so many fish to see! After I snorkeled for a few hours, I decided to just go out and float. The water was cold when you first got in and then it warmed up fairly quick. I think I could take a nap out on the waves! I swear if I were a mermaid, i would have my best frieds be a shark and manta ray and a whale...and they would stand [swim]  guard and I would just got to a warm spot in the ocean where no one could find me and take a nap floating, or even just cloud watch or stargaze! That would be so awesome!"

*Day 5: September 21*

Today was another super early day where I had to leave my DollGirl before she woke up. We had to be at the boat harbor by 5:30 so that we can head out to the island crater of Molokini by 5:45am! Super early, but I also was super excited! We were suppose to go snorkeling for an hour at Molokini and then an hour at Turtle Town...but unfortunately the ocean was really restless and the waves were showing and it was not the smoothest out there...and so we weren't able to snorkel at Turtle Town...we stayed two hours at Molokini.

I am thinking my lucky stars that I do not  get motion sickness because the ride out there to the island was and extremely bumpy and the opposite of smooth!

This was the boat that we took out to the island crater and I had to admit that it was a scary boat, but I had faith in the driver! But it felt like it was going to tip over!

My poor brother-in-law took two Dramamine pills for his motion sickness and he still wasn't feeling well!

But I had to admit that the sunrise was pretty spectacular over the water! I hope that I never have to live far away from the ocean!

After about an hour we finally get to the island crate. As you can kind of see, the water is already really choppy and messy!

And at first a lot of people took a chance and went out. I loved it! I absolutely love being out in the water! The choppiness of the water didn't phase me at all and I was swimming all over the place. I was with my BroIL for a the fist 30 minutes before he couldn't take it any longer and had to go back on the boat where I joined him for about 5 minutes to make sure that he was going to be okay. Then I went back out in the water. For awhile the underwater life was view-able and there were so many fish that would swim all around you and I saw a lot of eels and just a lot of gorgeous fish and coral! Then it was harder to see so far down and so my friend and I were just playing around in the water and just just swimming with the fish that were swimming around us. My friend and I were the last ones to leave the water and when we got back on the boat, I realized that most everyone was feeling motion sick! I really did feel bad for everyone...but I have to admit that the guides should have brought us in a long time ago since the water was really bad. I'm not the strongest swimmer and I have 100% respect for the ocean, but I did not feel like I was in any danger at all...but when I looked back out over the water, I was surprised with how bad the waves where!

But the water was an amazing color of blue and I think that it would be amazing to a mermaid to be able to live out on the water!

*Day 6: September 22*

"Today was a lazy sort of day. We had Breakfast at this really yummy place on the pier called Koa's. The view was amazing and I have to say that I am going to miss eating at Ocean front dining areas!

After that some of us went to the Lavender Farms and I have to say that this was one of my favorite things that we did while on Maui! I think that it was because we could still smell the ocean air and I was surrounded by a lot of beautiful flowers!

And the view...oh wow! The view was just so amazing...I was telling my BroIL that it was times like this were I didn't even know if I wanted to take pictures of the view since pictures don't do it justice! You would have to go there in person to see how amazing the beautiful, breath-taking view. It was amazing.

Here is my lil KaiBoy just running on the open fields and it warmed my heart seeing him so happy. :)

*Day 7: September 23*

Today we went beach hopping again and we were even able to see some penguins! :)

It was a very bittersweet day because we knew that it was our last day all together since everyone but my sister and her family and I were still going to stay one more day. So today we just enjoyed each other's company and tried not to be sad. It's always sad knowing that in less than 24 hours we were going to have to say goodbye. Goodbye's suck. :(

*Day 7: September 24*

By 9:00am more than half our group had left for the airport. It was really sad watching DollGirl and KaiBoy say and hug everyone bye. DollGirl especially was sad and her Grandma. (My sister's mother-in-law) It was fun and full of memory making and I am going to miss them. Before lunch time my sister's family and I had already checked out of our rooms and were making our way to Kehei to our condos that we rented there. While we were there we found a playground for DollGril and KaiBoy to play at while we killed some time before check-in.

It was hot, but my niece and nephew really liked it. :) And it got them in a better mood after saying goodbye to family and friends. It's always so hard being away from friends and family...but the good thing is that Hawai'i is our home also and we also made family and friends here too. :)

I just had to add that this is one of the best climbing trees! :)

*Day 8: September 25*

We woke up early and at at this real nice cafe down the road for breakfast before my BroIL had to go and do some work. I took my DollGirl too the pool and we stayed there for no less than 2 1/2 hours! It was a lot of fun and swimming can always help with any kind of sadness. When we got back to the condo, we ate a fast lunch and both her and I laid down for a nap. My sister was able to organize and pack everything. Then as soon as my BroIL was finished with his work...we went to the car rental area to drop off the SUV we were renting and jumped on a plane and now I am home writing this. :)

One things I did not add everyday because I knew that it would be a lot of repeating myself but I was in the water everyday. I swam in the saltwater pool everyday and we went to the beach nearly everyday. It was amazing. And I loved it. :)

I came home to find several of my monthly subscription boxes had come as well as several postcards. I will be posting subscription unboxings and postcard reveals through out this week only because right now, I just want to jump in the shower and then go to sleep. Time to hustle for that money again so that I can go on more adventures!