Ten Things That Makes Me Go WTF?! [Here in the Philippines]
There are times when I am juss going along in my life here in the Philippines, and then something happens and then I'm like "WTF!?!?" And so I decided to make a short list of the main things that make me look at someone (or someoneS) crazy and think… WTF?!?"
10. Okay…I have the timing down, and I know that if I leave the house at 7:15am, if I walk this fast and go this way I will make it in time for class which starts at 7:30am. I have juss enough time to make it to class and get a good seat with juss a few seconds to spare. I mean, come on now, who wants to even be UP at 7:30am much less be up earlier than that to even get ready for that early morning class! I leave the house, I check my watch, I'm good…I'm in a good mood because I'm not gonna be late…and then bam…three girls who walk as slow as a sloth moving in a tree, as if they have the whole time in the world…oh yeah, and don't forget that they don't walk behind each other, they walk BESIDE each other. I try to pass, but they won't let me…they have this "friends forever" linking arm thingy going on…and I'm like WTF!!!?
9.If you have never been to the Philippines, then you don't know that EVERYONE and their mom AND dog carries around with them an umbrella. Why don't we all take a look at what Encarta says about an umbrella shall we?
collapsible canopy that protects from weather: a round collapsible canopy of plastic or waterproof material on a frame at the top of a handle, held in the hand to protect somebody from rain, snow, or sun
Got it?! Okay…well, yeah…you can understand that it's a very handy object to keep with you, since it "protects somebody from rain, snow, or sun." Okay…well, juss try to imagine this with me…you are walking on a sidewalk, that is only so wide…. The sun is out and there is a barely a breeze to keep you from breaking out in a sweat. If you are like me, you have your shades on to protect you eyes from the glare of the sun…because if you are from anywhere but here, you like the fact that you are able to work on your tan…then you turn the corner, and you see the umbrella brigade. A group of a million people who have their umbrella. Okay, so that's cool, ya? I mean, umbrella's are good to protect you from the sun...but this umbrella brigade don't even move the umbrella! I mean, here you are walking against them people, and then each and everyone of them don't move their umbrella out of the way…so that those pole thingys that stick out around the umbrella hit you in the head…and after getting hit in the head by the 1 millionth umbrella pole thingy you are juss fuming mad from their lack of respect and you look at them and think WTF!?!!
8.In certain places in the world, they still have manual enrollment, meaning…you enroll by your personal self…none of this going online and enrolling your classes while you are sitting on your comfy chair, in your room, with the air-con on, and no lines to stand in. Manually enrolling means you have to stand in a long ass line waiting with TOLERANCE (not patience) for your turn to get to the front of the line. So for at LEAST FOUR HOURS you get pushed, banged, smushed, squished and almost trampled between millions of people who are as irritated as you AND there is so much body heat and body odor that makes you wanna gag…and of all places you get to stand behind the one person in the whole entire school who knows everyone. Oh yeah, and did I mention that there are most likely going to be more than 5 thousand students and only ONE person at the desk to "help" you…so yeah, imagine that. AND that person in front of you keeps seeing their friend…and what do friends do?! "oh here! Stand in line with me!" then they do this annoying thing…they turn around and with a sweet smile on their face they say, "They're with me…I was saving [his/her] spot…" And you juss look at them juss barely holding back from giving them a piece of your mind and think WTF!???!
7.It is a hot, hot, super humid day…and all I can think about is how I want to go home and sit in front of the fan and go to sleep. The classes are at least a 15 minute (if there are no slow ass walkers in front of me!) hard hike away from where I live…(think…concrete wall, rushing river, uneven path, dogs galore, SHIT (from the dogs) galore, Rape Street (the uneven alley way that me and my roomies named "Rape Street" since it's the perfect place where someone can abduct you and rape you. NO LIE), gates, guards with guns, and lots of tree's and HUGE bushes) and when I get home, you juss wanna get to me bed, flop down and juss enjoy a cold strawberry juice drink while my fan is stationed on me at number 3. I finally get home, sweating…I remove my top…I'm sweating and hot…and I turn the fan on, I have my cold drink…and I flop on my bed…I'm juss about to smile because I can finally relax, then all of a sudden the electricity goes off. No fan. It's hot. There is no air circulation (since my apartment has only ONE window in front of the house and it's TINY)…and I think WTF?!?!
6.I am walking along…minding my own business. There is a big open road in front ofme, behind me, beside and juss all around me…there I am juss walking…I hear someone coming up behind me…but hey, there is room all around for them to walk with out them touching me…big space…then they walk into me, they bump me, they collide with me…then walk on by because they are in a hurry, and as they walk beside me, trying to pass me by, they look at me with this really dirty look on me face…AS IF IT'S MY FAULT THAT THEY WALKED INTO ME! as if there wasn't open space all over the place. As if I were this huge object that took up the whole road and they couldn't get around me with out knocking into me…and I look back at them and say "sorry" for "being in the way" because since they were BEHIND me they couldn't be bothered to look up to see that I was there walking, minding my own business…and even though it really wasn't anyone's fault who walked into who (well, actually we all know who's "fault" it was…but who's naming names?!)…and I took the courtesy to say sorry they still look at me as ifI was an obstacle to the walking human population…and I think in your head…WTF!???!
5.My first class is at 7:30am. And if you know me, I am the worst morning person…well…maybe not the worst…but pretty close up there. I know that it takes me at least an hour to actually get out of bed. So let me let you know how I set my alarm or my alarms…so I have to be in class at 7:30am, ya? Move it one hour back…6:30am…then 30 minutes from that. So my first alarm is set at 6:am…2nd 6:30am and then the last at 6:45am. Then here is how it is done. My first alarm wakes me up at 6:am…that alarm prepares me to actually start waking up. My 2nd alarm 6:30am…tells me that I better start getting my butt up because I only have 15 more minutes before I have to actually get down from bed. 3rdalarm at 6:45am informs me that if I don't get in the bathroom right now, I will be late…so I get out of bed and take a 15 minute wake up shower (and the water is cold as the Merced River in April (for those of you who don't know…Merced River is the river that I almost died in about a year and a half ago! Which is one of the river's that get the juss thawed snow of Yosmite). So trust me, it's a fast wake up call if I ever needed one, which I always do. And then if I'm lucky, I didn't take that long in the bathroom…and it would be 7:am by the time I get out…and so I only have 15 minutes to put my uniform on and get my make up on and get my stuff ready for class…which literally takes me forever since even though I did get that "wake up" shower to "wake me up"…it doesn't really 100% help…and my brain is still sleeping. It takes me 15 minutes to walk to class…and that is even if I'm wide awake…! So you see how it's important how I listen to my alarm clock, because it's always a very close call with everything. This is what makes me angry though. If someone CALLS or TEXTS me at 6:29am or even worst at 6:44am. It annoys and pisses me for various of reasons….one being that I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON AND I DON'T WANNA BE BOTHERED and two, because that one minute helps a lot…and it annoys me because sometimes it's for the most dumbest thing they call or text… "Che are you awake yet?!" Yeah, that really, really REALLY makes me go…WTF!????!?
4.When I allow someone to borrow something of mine…like my portable USB drive…and they return it and it's broken…and they go something like… "Oh, Ate, I'm so sorry, but it's okay because your from America and your rich…so you can juss buy another one." And then they frikin' laugh like it's no big deal…and I can't blow up, because then they will think that I'm being so "maarte" and for some reason they really stereotype people here, and since I'm a foreigner…and if I blow up, they will categorize that ALL foreigners (namely from US) are so "maarte"…and I juss wanna yell my frustrations and all the unfairness in life…and I think WTF?!?!?
3.Let me explain the whole cell phone system here. You buy a cell phone and sim card separately. You can have a cell phone, but it's useless unless you buy a sim card…which is your number. And then you can't use your cell phone or sim card unless you "load" your phone. So basically it's like a pre-paid service thingy here. P1=1 local text….P7=a local phone call + (I think) P4 per minute (so technically it's P11=a one minute local phone call….P20=a international phone call + P30 per minute (so technically it's P50=a one minute international phone call). P15=1 international text. Got that? Oh yeah, the exchange rate now for the US$ to P (pesos) is now $1=P45…(by the way, I usually keep at least P60 load on my phone, unless my wonderful brother sends me load, since there is a website so that "loved-ones" from the States can send load…and the minimum for that is P115…but yeah…I try to keep P60…because if I need to call home I still can.) I hate it when people text me asking for a favor…ASAP…I always answer back…because it's only nice to let that person know that you got their text…and sometimes the text is urgent so it's good to get a reply…but I hate it when I need help or something from someone…and they never reply back! I mean, hello…I usually text locally, and so that is only ONE PESO! Am I not even worth ONE peso to let me know that you got my frikin' text?! I'm nice enough to answer the person back…but they don't return the favor… that pisses me off and makes me go WTF!?!?
2.Whoever invented "Filipino Time" should have freezing cold water poured on them and dry powder dispensed all over them and then last but certainly not the least a buttload of feathers thrown at them! I mean…who is proud to go by "Filipino Time" anyways?! I mean, that only means that you are NOT punctual and you aren't reliable! For those of you who don't know what "Filipino Time" is…it's the term referred to Filipino's because they are almost ALWAYS late for everything…if something was planned at 5:pm…don't even bother coming until 7:pm…because that is how late these people can get…it annoys me to death! I'm not saying that ALL Filipino's are like that…I'm juss saying that MOST people here are like that. It really annoys me to all frustrations and pissy-offiness and it most definitely makes me go WTF!?!????!
1.When I get a phone call from home, and that person is crying because they are hurt, betrayed, "alone", confused, and they need someone right now…and I can't do anything about it except hear them crying, bawling, and in pain because I'm 50 katrillion miles away from home…and I get this feeling of acheiness in my heart down to the depths of my stomach because I'm such a shitty friend/cousin/sister because I can't be there for them…that is the ultimate time I feel like crying and screaming WTF?!????!???!?!???!?