Saturday, April 30, 2011

End of April.
Wow, really?! It's already the last day of April...where has time gone! Although looking back at it, April seemed to fly really did. It just went by. That probably didn't make much sense, but it did to me. *laughs* But wow, what really hit me about April?!

Well, in the beginning of this month, I had to say goodbye to a dear friend. Adam. He has served our country for a couple years and yes, it was time for him to move on...and so he is now back on the mainland going to school in Nebraska! I hope that he has a successful future! I know that he will. I will miss him and I can't wait to see him again!

My sister had her birthday this month! I can't believe that I'm only a year and some younger than her! I remember when we were younger we use to fight...but now, I can understand why. But I will always consider my sister as someone that I can trust. I love her and I'm glad that I was able to spend her special day with her and friends.

I volunteered for the I Love Kailua Town Party...oh mandope, that was a tiring week for me! "Work" on Sunday and then straight off to Monday...and we all know that I'm not too fond of Mondays! But in itself it was a pretty fun day. A lot of people came out and I got to meet a lot of new people and walk around and learn about Kailua. Oh, that was a HOT HOT HOT day! Good thing I live right near the beach so I can just jump in to cool off!!
School was crazy for Easter week! We had parties galore...but I survived it all...sugered-up kids and all! *laughs* It was worth seeing all those cute little darlings having fun and laughing.

I did swim more. I swam in new places too, and I think that I'll be signing up to swim in a race. Kaleo says that I'm I'm pretty excited about that. I didn't get to join a gym like I wanted too, but hopefully I will in the future, when my school hours aren't so crazy.

This month, I have been missing my parents more and more...but I really hope that they are okay...I love them. And miss them...and yeah, I miss them...

Well, here is to April...thank you for all that you have taught me and the memories I made!!!

"I've always believed that a lot of trouble in the world would disappear if we were talking to each other instead of about each other." -Ronald Reagan, 40th US President, April 11, 1984

The Royal Wedding.

Yes, I love weddings. And yes, I still dream of meeting my prince charming and getting married in this fairytale wedding and living happily ever after. :) And yes, I am not ashamed to admit that I am one of "those girls" who dreams of her perfect wedding.

So The Royal Wedding happened on April 28, 2011...and yes, even though it was big thing, I did not stay up to watch it. I did love and enjoy looking at the pictures to see what happened the next day after it all happened. I do that. I love looking at weddings...there is something so romantic about it. Maybe it's the whole love is in the air type of thing. *laughs*

I do have to say that I am happy that Kate has found her prince charming...a literal prince charming, and I do hope the best for both of them. They sure do look happy in their pictures!
I am so happy for this new couple and I wish them happiness, success, and many years together making wonderful memories!

Goodbye, Michael.

I really liked The Office, and I am kind of sad that Michael is now gone. I haven't followed as religiously as I did before. Skipping episodes from time to time, but always catching up on I remember when I was in the Philippines still, my cousin got me hooked up on this series. It never failed to crack me up...and the jokes from the show...oh mandope! Made me laugh for hours even after I watched it! The pranks that Pam and Jim would play on Dwight, and how Dwight would be so serious, oh mandope, so funny. 

Yeah, I'm sad that it's nearly over now, but I'm glad that they did have that show. It makes me wonder, could I work in that kind of working atmosphere?! Most definitely, it would have it's ups and downs...but for sure there would never be a boring day. Just something new and unexpected every day. I would love to visit Scanton, Pennsylvania just because. I would probably freeze there in the winter, but it would be a fun place to visit, I think. *laughs* I don't really know what is there, but still, I would like to stop by because I eventually want to make my way to Pennsylvania. 

Talking among my friends, they all say that I would be a Kelly. What?! Really?! Well, yeah, I talk a lot...*laughs*...but really?! Oh! Have you seen the music video that her and Erin made?! It's soo funny!! Here, I'll share it with you!

(Well, it wouldn't let me upload the music video...:( )

But yes, I'm sad that it's over...but I'm glad that I'll be able to watch the episodes over and over Friends, coz I did love Friends!

Well, goodbye Michael...I shall miss you.
"That's what she said."-Michael, The Office

What a week.
This week was a tough week for me. It started out great with a simple phone call, then from there it was a struggle to keep the smile on my face. Everyday I had to work overtime. Not complaining there, just super frustrated with the lack of communication. I had things planned that had to be pushed back or even cancel because of the last minute overtime. And I'm talking about the super last minute over time, like 4:30pm rolls around and as I am leaving, "Oh yeah, can you please stay for 2 more hours?!" What?! And by that time, even if I said no, it would be illegal to leave the remaining teacher with no one else to stay behind.

I talked to the director about it. So I hope that things like that doesn't happen again. But I mean, every day this week...I don't mind doing it...staying back occasionally. Seriously, I don't mind helping the times where things fall though. I understand emergencies do happen and someone needs to go home, or someone can't come in...but why do they tell me super last minute, I do have a life after work.

The kids where having a hard time this week too. Actually, everyone seemed like they were having a tough week...the staff and the kids a like. We were short of staff for whatever reason every day...and this is talking short at least two teachers and two aids...and that is a lot. Where are our floaters when we need them!! We managed, but we were all scrambling.

The kids were feeling the frustration and were acting out. And we have a new little one in our room. She's not potty trained the way her mom said she was...and she doesn't talk to us yet. I don't worry about her though, because this is her first time away from her mom and she needs her time to get used to everyone and being in a new place. It's cute because he's attached herself to me, so she'll talk to me...softly, unsure, and very tiny. She is so cute. I love how when she sees someone cleaning up, she will go over and help them clean up. And I think that it's adorable when she sees someone sad or crying, she goes over and curiously looks at them in the face, brushing their tears away and then gives them a hug. Yeah, she isn't potty train, but she's getting there. And she is a curious one; she'll do fine.

My ultimate challenge this week was with a very defiant little girl. Knowing her background has helped me understand her behaviors, but it's hard giving her the attention she craves when there are 13 others in the classroom that I have to give my attention too. It's getting harder and harder to get her to listen the more comfortable she gets with us teachers. I can see the other classroom teacher is struggling with her as well. She craves attention, and I want to give it to her; yes, I want to give her all the attention she wants, because I am rooting for her future, but I'm just not allowed too. I have already been "talked to" about getting to attached to the children. I can't treat her differently from the other children, but in a way I have too. It's confusing, and I just hope...I just hope for her.

My sister and her husband are still in California; they will be back this coming up Monday. I'll be picking them up at the airport. I've missed them, but honestly, I think that this was a welcome break from my older sister...nothing wrong with her and I...I love her with everything I am...but you know how older sister can be. :) It will be good to see her again. Her and my brother-in-law.

Can't wait to see what this new weeks comes too! I'm pretty positive for it...and hopefully, I won't have to work overtime all week! :) But ohgoodnessgracious, the weekend could not have come at a more perfect time. I love what I do, but I sure to love my days off as well. Well, when I think about it, of course the weekend comes at the most perfect time! If it came in the middle of the week, what would we have to look forward too when Friday rolls around?! Work straight start on way! Yeah, even though,  my week seemed long, and I wished that the weekend would come earlier, it came at the right time. *laughs*

"Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless."-Bill Waterson

Thursday, April 28, 2011


What?! Really?! No way?! Awww...

How come it feels like it should be a Friday already...?! It's really only Thursday?! Bummer. What a long week...and it's still going....tomorrow...come tomorrow come!!

"The sun will come up tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, they'll be sun. Just thinking about tomorrow clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow, 'till there's none!! So when you're stuck with a day, that's gray and lonely, just stick up your chin and grin and saaaaayyyyy!!! The sun will come up tomorrow so you gotta hang on 'till tomorrow...come what maaaayyy!!! TOMORROW!!! TOMORROW!!! I'll love you tomorrow, YOU'RE ONLY A DAY AWAY!!!!"

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

I love this thought. :)
So yesterday I had to work late again. But my friend has been trying to get me to play on her family's volleyball team for weeks now, and Mondays are always bad for me because because something always turns up, like having to work late or something. But yesterday, I was like screw this, I told Jess that I would go, even if I was a little late.

They start their games at 6:pm; I got out of work at, yeah. I got home and yelled at my brother that I was going to the Waimanalo gym to play volleyball with my friend and her family and he decided to come along and so I threw on my gym clothes and off we went. They were only warming up when we got there we were still good.

I did learn one thing though, I was super rusty! I hadn't really played volleyball for at least 2-3 years! Maybe even four! And I'm not in shape either...but that is going to change, yep it is! Coz I had a lot of fun and I want to keep going...if things don't keep popping up that prevents me from going.

My friend said that they were going to have a game again today, Tuesday, but I already know that I can't make it, because also at 6:pm, I have to be at a class for my work about Special Needs children. I work again today until I'm going to have to be late for this class. It's so dumb. I don't know why my boss does that...she knows that I have to go to a class FOR WORK at six, but then she has me working until six. Makes no sense to me. I am glad though, because these classes can be all over the island...but this one is still in Kailua at another preschool. So I'm sure that I can get there in less than 15 minutes...[the cut time for class is 6:15pm] I might have to go straight from work coming home first. Ugh...the class is for three hours! I guess no dinner for me! Oh well...I won't die.

Yesterday we had this little angel start preschool. She is 2 1/2...and she is the cutest ever. I know that I say that about all my little ones...but I can't help it...they are ALL cute! :) She doesn't talk though, I think when she gets comfortable enough she will talk. Anyways, during the last snack that was at, she wouldn't eat. And we could figure out why. We realized that her mom still hand fed her [you can tell] but she still wouldn't eat if you would try do that. We had juice and animal crackers. Finally, I was like just drink your juice, coz it was a hot day today and you need to keep hydrated. She wouldn't. So I usually give the kids water if they won't drink their milk or juice. When I approached her with her cup of water she downed that thing like there was no tomorrow...and 3 more cupfuls afterwards. After that she ate all her cookies. She wouldn't touch her juice though. That poor darling was THIRSTY! The last time the kids had water was at 9.45am for their morning snack! For lunch, I wasn't in the room because we were short of staff that at times I would go to the other rooms to help out with more more rowdier older ones. So I would just pop in, and didn't realize that she had milk/juice. So I was thinking, was the last time she had water was 9.45am?! Oh my goodness, we were so used to the kids just drinking from the drinking fountain when they were thirsty. But this little girl is SO shy, she probably didn't do that. And she doesn't talk so we don't know what she is thinking, we can only guess. But I'm glad that I gave her water. And at least I know now for today. She'll be okay. I love my 2/3 year old class, they are so good. :)

Well, I gotta get ready for work now. Hope today is just as good as yesterday...I know it's going to be tiring...but it's good to have a busy day. :)

"Life is short; break the RULES, FORGIVE quickly, KISS slowly, LOVE truly, LAUGH uncontrollably, and NEVER REGRET anything that made you SMILE."

Monday, April 25, 2011

Eleven minutes.

When I was in the Philippines I survived by constantly being around my friends [a lot of foreigners that were in the same situation as I was], running in the morning and night to get rid of negative energy, working out/lifting weights, music [oh mandope, music helped me a lot!], dancing, my roomates [for 2 years, then I lived on my own when they graduated], and my neighbor/best[guy]friend - more like the whole apartment complex and all the people that lived there.
Pictures of me and my two roomies that helped me survived
I had the best haven to get away from all the hardships and stress. Gate 2, Go Apartments. The best. I was the only girl on my floor and for a really long time, the only girl [student] in my whole apartment complex. And all of us became good friends and it was our little haven to do whatever we want. We were all mostly foreigners except for my neighbors on the left who were local Filipino's...they were the best though. We all would leave our doors open and we would just walk in whenever we want too so it seems. When one cooked, we all cooked for everyone. And music was ALWAYS being played. My local Filipino's would always make me popcorn whenever I had a bad day.

I was showing my mom "the short" cut from my apartment to school!
The sign says, "Jumping the wall is not allowed, P1000 if caught" :)

When I rescued my little kitties, Triszanah and Toby, the whole apartment complex helped me take care of them when I was off in school and I couldn't watch them...especially those times where I had to stay the whole weekend in the Psych department. They were the best. I wouldn't mind leaving my door unlocked when I was gone either, so that they can watch movies or just more space to do homework [I lived by myself in a 2 bedroom/1 bathroom, living room, kitchen apartment], or if they needed my stove.

I got super close with my neighbor. Achalu. He became my best friend. Well, more than a best friend...I don't know what's that would be called. We never got "together", but we were pretty close. He made me smile when I thought I couldn't. He would wake up early to go jogging and work out with me so I didn't have to go alone, he would cook for me when I was too busy to cook, we would watch movies at his apartment together, take our study breaks together. I think those were one of my favorite times. Our study breaks. He just graduated from Medical Technology and I'm super proud of him. Because when I was there and was taking Psychology we would stay up all night long, and he would make sure that I would take a study break and bring out the coffee and we would go out on the balcony and sit out there for a few minutes juss talking, and looking at the stars and moon. Full moons make me think of him.

He would laugh because there would be times where I would go to his apartment to study because my apartment had too much stimulation for me to be distracted and so I would go to his [think bachelor pad! Nothing there! :)]...and he would laugh because he could tell I was studying, but I would move a lot, hum to myself, dance, switch positions, sit down, lay down...but study all the while. I could never sit still.

I will never forget New Years Eve/Day 2009. It was only us....everyone already went home. The first AND LAST time I'll ever get drunk. He took care of me...NEVER took advantage of me...and I will always trust him for that.

When it came closer to the time that I left, it was more sadder and sadder as the days came by. It's always sad to say goodbye to someone you grow to care about. He actually never said bye. When it was time for me to leave, he never showed up. He called instead. He didn't want to say goodbye because he didn't want to see me cry...and there was no goodbyes. But I won't forget our last few days/nights. Pumping up the music dancing, last minute conversations, late-night starbucks runs, coffee/wine/pizza dates out on the balcony, just spending time together.

We knew that once I left, it won't ever be the same again. He's Ethiopian, he's going to go back home. I live here in Hawaii...long distance suck. But he is one person that I have kept in contact with. He called me last night. At 1:30am-1:41am...11 minutes and it was so good to hear his voice. I'm a light sleeper so when the phone rang and I saw that it was unknown, I didn't know if I wanted to pick it up...but I'm glad I did. I haven't heard his voice since April 2009, but from the first "Hello Charity..." He has this way of saying it, and I knew right away that it was him and I was like "Achalu?!"

Eleven minutes and we said so much. We talked about the moon, how we missed our balcony dates, our study breaks, watching movies in each other's apartments. He told me about graduation, and I told him how happy I am living here. [I told him my dreams was to live here in Hawaii a long time ago, and he admires the fact that I did it], He told me how all the Ethiopians say hi [I knew a lot of them through him], I told him that I still stay in contact with some of my friends from there. And once again, we confirmed our dates.

When I told him that my favorite place in the world is Hawaii, even before I had an inkling I was going to move here, we set a date to meet up. No matter what, even if we were married or not, with kids or not...we would bring ourselves [and our family if we had by then] and meet here in Hawaii on June 17, 2020.

He loves Fiji, so August 25, 2020 we will meet there- married or not, kids or not, no matter what.

That's our dates: June 17, 2020-Hawaii, August 25, 2020- Fiji...I can't wait, Achalu. I miss you.
March 25, 2009, Eddie's Dedication

"If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you  want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. But anytime you need a friend, I"ll just be me."-Author Unknown

Sunday, April 24, 2011


A few weeks before my parents left to be missionaries in the Philippines, I was having a hard time; The hardest time. I had just gotten back from the Philippines after a few years, and I was really excited to be with my family again. Philippines was a learning experience for me, but I still have a hard time talking about what happened to me there. So coming home to be with my family to heal was something that carried me through the hard when my parents told me less than 6 months of me being home that they were going to leave, I was devastated. I tried my best to stay happy, and for all appearances I was. I had no one to talk to but my dad and my best friend/ Baili.

They had originally told me that they were going to leave a few days before my birthday, and I told my dad that please, just give me my birthday with my family. I hadn't had my birthday with my family for 6 years, and that all I wanted for my birthday, to be with my family. So they left on the 21st of June. Four days after my birthday, three days after putting Baili to sleep. I still have that empty feeling in my heart.

But there was this one night I couldn't handle the pain anymore so I told my brother and we went out of my favorite things to do was ride in the car with my brother with the music bumping really loud, with me talking about anything and everything and randomly busting into song and dancing. And so this night, my brother and I got in his car...because I felt like I couldn't escape the pain.

We rode around Vallejo for about a hour with me crying, talking, just venting, unburdening to my brother...and when I was okay again we went home. Instead of going into the house after we parked, we stayed in the car on the driveway and for some reason, I switched the radio from my favored stations to the christian station. I don't know why I even did that, because I don't ever do that [unless it's a Saturday in respect to my brother]. And this song came on...What Faith Can Do by Kutless.

I didn't think that I could make it...but when I heard this song, I knew that I just had to keep standing up when I fall down, wake up when I went to sleep, smile when I wanted to cry, believe in miracles.

I heard this song again coming back from the beach [church] yesterday, and it brought tears to my eyes. I believe that God talks to me through music, and He knew I needed to hear this song again.

"I've seen dreams that moved that mountains, hope that doesn't ever end even when the skies are falling. I've seen miracles just happen, silent prayers get answered, broken hearts become brand new...that's what Faith can do."- Kutless, What Faith Can Do

Saturday, April 23, 2011


I heard this song on the radio coming back from the beach; we had Easter Sabbath on the beach. I love singing to the radio...but I don't normally listen to Christian stations anymore, but my brother [who was driving] likes to listen to the Christian station on Saturday, so I respect that, since he is the one who was driving. And I knew some of the songs...but then two songs played, back to back from each other. The first song was Blessings By Laura Story. And as I was listening to words, it made me think about all the things that I went through.

I remember when I went to be a missionary for 6 months in the Philippines, they said that the hardships were building character...but no, listening to this song, yeah, it builds character [all I know is that I got bitter after the whole experience], but song talks about the things that we ask for in prayer...and "What if your blessings come through raindrops, what if your healing comes through tears, what if a thousand sleepless nights is what it takes to know You're near. What if trials like this are you mercies in disguise."

Yeah, I believe that God does answer all our prayers...but maybe not in the way that we expect it. Like I say, everything happens for a reason, and when you are experiencing the hardship and trials now, you can't see it, but looking back on life you can. I know that I'm having religion problems and doubts. I do have a spiritual life with Jesus, but when it comes to all the rules and regulations and laws of a religion, that is where I start having problems. But this song really made me think about my life and what I would ask God for in prayers. So, I want to share the song with you in hopes that it will touch you the way that it touched me.

"What if your blessings come through raindrops, what if your healing comes through tears, what if a thousand sleepless nights is what it takes to know You're near. What if trials like this are you mercies in disguise."-Laura Story, Blessings


So for church today we had it at Sherwoods Beach in Waimanalo. It was hot. Super hot, so I'm glad that we had it at the beach. I only went because it was at the beach. Kaleo had callled my brother to ask him if he would help set up at 7:30am...and so I went to help set up too. Oh mandope, did I mention that it was SUPER hot?! Yeah, it was hot.

So we had fun setting up with Kaleo and his family. I don't know why it was only his family, but it was, and it was fun because they are a fun family. Kalii [Kaleo's younger brother] was there and he was making me laugh...we were teasing him that it was so obvious that he has his own business coz he liked to be bossy and tell me and Tracy what to do, while sitting down on the cooler. *laughs* Nah, he would get up and help too.

Then Kaleo, Tracy, my brother and I went out to eat breakfast at this crepes place. I rather not go to church, and so we kind of skipped out on most of the church part because we were out having breakfast, but when we got back there were SO MANY people there already! And they were nearly done with the service. But as we were having breakfast, oh mandope, I was super hyper for some reason...I was telling story a lot! But Kaleo said that I kept bouncing up and down and then start singing randomly. He's it was good to hear him laugh.

It was good that I was hyper, because while the church service was finishing, I still had a lot of energy to burn off and so I was just playing with the kids there.

I met more people there. I met this guy name Christian, he's from Tennessee...and he was there to visit. And then this family from Nicaragua...they had just moved here a few months ago, and they sang. In Spanish...and so Tracy was talking with them, since she is fluent in Spanish; They understand English a little and so I was talking with them...not as fast as I normally talk, but a little slower. There were four of them, I didn't get to meet the guy though, he was there...but I was all over the place since I hadn't seen everyone in a while, but it was good to meet them.

We didn't get to do the Sand Castle competition, but the kids had a scavenger hunt, treasure hunt AND a easter egg hunt...sorry parents, the prize was candy! Hope the kids won't be too hyper! Coming home I heard a new song that I want to post about and this other song that I want to post about, and so I'm going to do that in a bit. I'm hot, so I'm going get some cold apple juice from the refrigerator.

Later tonight we're going to go to my friends house to watch movies and drink smoothies...YUMMY!!! :)

"If you must speak ill of another, do not speak it, write it in the sand near the water's edge."- Napoleon Hill

Good Morning!

Good morning! I woke up today at 6:am again...well, actually at and then at think that is my body's alarm can get annoying but, I think I'm okay with it now. I mean, my whole room is flooded with light by the time it's anyways, I can't help but get up.

It's SO beautiful today. I'm going to the beach. And I'm going to the beach tomorrow. Oh, I love it here! *laughs* I wouldn't mind being a beach bum...well, maybe I would, but I would rather be a bum here than in Cali...the winters there are fierce! And summer is deathly yes, here would be nice...

So blessings to me that I'm not a bum ANYWHERE! But I like it here. I think I'll stay for awhile...

I woke up on the right side of bed, I do that more often then not now-a-days; yes, that is a good thing! *laughs* I think that is how it feels to be comfortable where you are and with what you're doing. I still have to face things that happen to me in the past, but I can say that I'm pretty much happy where I am.

I have a friend who is so sad, because she gets up everyday and doesn't like that she is doing. So that affects everything that she does and is. And that makes me so sad, because I know how that feels. I really do. I remember, even less than a year ago when I would have to forcefully think happy thoughts when I woke up in the morning because I refused to go under. But it was a constant struggle, hourly struggle. When I think about those times, I get sad.

I try to be there in every way that I downer about being here in Hawaii is that it's hard to be there for family and friends when they need the mainland or even in the Philippines...and other places in the world, since I did make a lot of international friends when I went to school abroad. But I guess no matter where I live, I will always have that problem. I still try to do small things for them to let them know that I'm still here and that I care. I wish someone had done that for me when I needed someone. But like I always say, everything happened for a reason; I think I was allowed to feel what it truly meant to be lonely and like no one was there for me so that I know how it would feel when I see other's feeling that way and I can help them.

All these people calling themselves friends, and they are...I know that they all mean well, and we are all busy in life...but I have learned the difference between the different kind of friendships that are out there. But yeah, at least I know what it feels like to be...stop! I'm rambling sad talk now! *laughs*

Anyways, I'm going to the beach today to do a sandcastle competition!! It's going to be brother and I volunteered to help set up so I better get going!!

SMILE, it's going to be a GREAT day! *hugs*

Friday, April 22, 2011

Good Friday.

Yay! I had a day off today because of Good Friday. This week was pretty chaotic with my brother and sister leaving for the mainland for a visit, all the Easter parties going on in school, all the field trips going on in school, working late for workers that left/took a vacation and doing the final paperwork on my totaled car...I still have to work stuff out with the insurance though.

*sigh* I can finally relax!

I woke up at 6:am and I couldn't go back to sleep so I took a shower and wrote letters to my parents. [Goodness! I miss them!] I went "wondering around the windward" with my brother, just because we could. We went to several stores because of the sales...Easter Sales! Yay! :) I had the music blasting, the windows down, singing and dancing to the was a perfect day.

"Never stop smiling because you never know who is falling in love with your smile."


Happy birthday, Matt. 

I'm sorry.

Working Late.

These past few days I have to work late. I usually just work until 4:30-5:pm, depending on the pick-up of the children...and now I'm covering for another co-worker who took a vacation and I work until 6:00-6:30pm...I know that it's like only like an hour-hour and half more...but by that time, I feel to tried to do anything else. I really don't like working this shift, but hey, it's more hours. And as the children dwindle down, I get to have more one-on-one time with the children whose parents pick them up at the later time.

And I get to swing on the swings. :)

There is this one boy who was picked up last yesterday and I was talking to him. We both were on the swings...and we were both just talking story, and the conversation that I had with him was an amazing and fun one. I wish people who were stressed out could just take the time to talk to a child, their mind is just this amazing thing that it really is an honor to listen to them talk, their thoughts, their ideas.

His matter-of-fact way that he talks makes me smile. His explanation for certain things is so awesome in it's simplicity...why are lions loud and rabbits quiet? [Lions want attention because the bunnies get them all coz they are so cute. Baby lions are cute too, so thats why they aren't as loud as the daddy.] Why does it rain when the sun is out? [Because when it's hot I want to go swimming. But the sun can't swim, so it just rains.] Why we have sand in the sandbox? [So that we can build sandcastles] What about the sand outside the sandbox? [So that we can also build sandcastles outside the sandboxes when there are too many people in the sandbox.]

The stories that they tell are so fun too. The things that we don't even think about becomes a memorable event for the child. Even their make-believe stories make me laugh to listen too. One of the things that I always say when a child tells me a story is, "And then what happened?!" Oh the things they come up with. One of my little rascals was telling me about the new dog he got because he showed me his slipper and how his dog likes to chew on it [and then what happened?] and he had to get it so that the dog won't eat it [and then what happened?!] and then his sister wanted to play with him [and then what happened?!] but then she had to go to school [and then what happened] and he wanted his ball to play with [and then what happened?] but he brought goodie bags for everyone in the class [and then what happened?!]...yeah, it can go on for's so cute!

So yeah, even though I hate working late because I just hate closing up and all that, I do loving talking and playing with the last few kids, trying to get their mind off the fact that they are the last ones to be picked up. Try just stopping one day to hear the day of a always reminds me that no matter what happens a child will make an ordinary day turn out to be the best day of their life.

"Children are the world's most valuable resource and its best hope for the future."-John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Easter School Party.

On Wednesday we had our annual Easter party at the preschool. It was a lot of fun...each class [five of them] came up with games that we had as stations and we decorated up the place with Easter decorations.

Our little two/three year olds wore our art projects. A few days before we had the children make bunny ears and bunny tails, and so they wore them that day and they were sooo cute! They loved it too, because they liked to pretend that they were little bunnies. Watching their faces as they were playing the games were so priceless.

The game that my little two/three year olds contributed was Find the Eggs and Ring Toss. For the find the eggs games Nicole brought a blow up kiddie pool from home and we had a bag of at least 50 plastic balls or different colors. You know the balls that are in that ball pool that kids can play in...[I would never let MY child play in those ball pools though!!] and then we bought large plastic eggs of the same colors and mixed it in with the other balls. So the children had to take turns finding the taught the children sorting, colors, numbers, shapes while having fun. And the ring toss was the ring toss...mainly the older children played with that while they waited for the Find the Eggs game.

I hope that I never get tired of playing with a child.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011


Hawaiian Sunrise [take from my sister before she left for the airport]

Goodmorning. It is one of those days again where I couldn't sleep straight through the night and I finally gave up when I thought that it was okay to actually get up out of bed at 6.01am. I read a little. I'm currently reading Plague Maker by Tim Downs. It's a pretty good book...I hated putting it down to get up...and I love how the chapters are short and fast paced. I just finished another of his book Chop Shop which is another good book with an unexpected ending...

My back hurts. Maybe it's because I sleep wrong, but no, I know that I don't stay in one position the whole night...too much playing [with my preschool kids], no, that can't be it. Maybe it's just stress...yeah, maybe stress. I love going to my friends' Tracy and Kaleo's house because they have all these muscle massagy thingys! AND Kaleo can do a mean massage that hurts like a mofo and leaves you feeling like jello...but oh mandope, does it ever work! *laughs* It's my upper left side that hurts. Usually it starts hurting's my back really. I know that proper way of picking things it can't be that I pulled it. But I'm not TOO worried coz there usually is a knot just right there where it hurt...I can feel it too. I think it's time for a massage right now about now. 

I woke up early that I had time to wonder around the house. My sister and her husband left for Cali yesterday morning, so I don't hear them walking around. My sister is just like me...she can't sleep the night though, but unlike me, she likes to walk around the house at random hours trying to get WORK done. I juss either lay in bed, read, or write. Oh, and sometimes surf the internet. Not always a good thing, coz then I usually end up buying something that I saw. *laughs* My sister was in ER again. She texted me last night saying that she ended up in the ER. I get worried everytime she goes to ER. I have only been in the ER once. When I thought I broke my ankle...but I had just fractured it. And that was when I was in seventh grade. My sister has been in ER multiple times....EVERY YEAR for nearly her whole life. And I never get used to it. It still stops my heart a little bit when I hear she's in ER. 

Yesterday, during lunchtime...we had [lets see *thinks back*] Pepperoni pizza, mixed steamed vegetables, apples, milk and juice/water. All the kids were pretty problem, just little ones here and there. Typical "twin" problems and toddler problems...nothing out of the ordinary. It's fun watching the little ones eat. They will try everything...that is something we encourage in the classroom. At least try it, if you don't like it...spit it out in your napkin and cover it. I was watching a little girl eat her apples. I already know that she doesn't like apples...but she tries everytime because everyone likes apples and eats them first and of course she wants to copy them. I was sitting across the way at the other table, she was looking at me, smiling coz she is just a smiler that one. *laughs*...when she made that look that she didn't like what she was eating. I told her..."H*****, it's okay, you tried it...spit it out." She kept shaking her head with that look that she doesn't like it. Then I realized Oh. My. Goodness. She. Is. FUCKING CHOKING! The other teacher noticed it at the same time and as I got up to go to the little one, Nicole [my other teacher in the room] got to her first [she was sitting right next to her at the same table] and did the child heimlich maneuver on her...all the while the little girl was looking at me, starting to turn blue...the piece she was choking on shoots out and everything calms down. Seriously, me and Nicole are trying to get her to drink something, asking her if she was okay...and this little girl, just sits in her chair as if nothing happened and starts to eat her pizza. A few minutes later she is holding her apple again, with this look on her face...should I eat this...when she starts to cry....runs to me and climbs on my lap. She's okay. We called the mom. She's fine. 

Today we have our school's Easter egg hunt. This should be fun. Yay...!! :)

"I kept everything inside even though I tried, it all fell apart. What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard." In The End, Linkin Park

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Dog Death.

It's been 10 months and 1 day since my Baili was put to sleep. June 18, 2010 is one of my top three worst days in my life...June 2010 was the worst month in my life...last year in general was a pretty hard year for me.

Since I got back from the Philippines on December 8, 2009...I have had a very hard time just trying to get my feet back on stable ground. 2010 did not help at all. I still have a hard time talking about May-August, 2010 It was only until I moved here to Hawaii, August 30, 2010 did I start to heal...and it's an on-going process. I still try to stay positive...

But when my best friend was put to sleep on June 18, 2010...I thought I wasn't going to make it myself. I have gotten close to a lot of people, I use to be super out-going...but I have learned that people will let you down. I use to trust,  now I am slowly...and trying to realize that it still exist, maybe in fairytales it can happen...and even though I believe in's hard to come by.

Baili never let me down. And I fell like I let him down. But reading this story that my friend posted on his facebook page help me have a odd sense of closure...yeah, I tear when I read it...because he was gone too soon from my life, but it totally makes sense...kinda. But oh, I miss him so much, I can't look at pictures and think of him without feeling that hollow, empty, deep feeling in my heart....

Why Dogs Live Shorter Lives

Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owner, Ron, and his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle. I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home. 

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. The felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.
The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for awhile after Belker's death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animals live shorter than human lives.

 Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, "I know why."

Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live.

He said, "People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life-like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?" The six-year-old continued, "Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long."

I miss Baili. I'll always miss my Baili...and I regret being away from him the last years of his life...being in a place that was so *blah, blah, blah*. But I will never regret anything that made me smile, and Baili was always there for me when I needed to talk and I couldn't smile anymore...he was there for me to talk to...even though it was pouring rain, freezing cold outside, he would sit there, while I hugged him crying because I was hurt, I didn't want to leave, life wasn't fair, my heart was broken, my expectation fell short, someone pissed me off. He was there when I was hyper and wanted run and play around...he was there to greet me whenever I came home...not caring that I was gone for months. Oh, I miss you Baili...yeah, you were hyper, yeah, you were scary [to others] when you would run super fast up to them...but you loved. Oh you loved everyone and only wanted love in return...and you got it. I know I have a guardian Angel watching over...but I think I'm pretty lucky to also have my guardian dog to be with me. I miss you, Baili. I love you.

[I'd put a picture up of my Baili, but I still tear up when I look at his picture.]
"Love is stronger than death even though it can't stop death from happening, but no matter how hard death tries it can't separate people from love. It can't take away our memories either. In the end, life is stronger than death."

I love Kailua.

Yesterday was a long day. Sunday...the day that I say that was given to me to do whatever I want that day. But it was taken away from me because my preschool that I work at volunteered to do the jumping houses for the I Love Kailua Town Party! And can we say HOT HOT HOT!?! Oh mandope!

So, every year the my preschool donate their time to do this festival...BUT no one really told me. I mean they told me about it, but I thought that it was IF you wanted it...but it wasn' wasn't that bad...but the fact that I didn't have a car to drive there, because my car is totaled. [Oh, yeah, did I mentioned that my car was TOTALED?!] Anyways, we were suppose to help out from 10:30am-1:30pm...the hottest time of the day.

I ended up walking there with my friend Jackie. It was a hot walk, but it was okay, because it was part of the route that I would jog anyways some days. It took us 30 minutes to walk there. And if you think I talk a need to meet SHE is a talker! *laughs* I realize that I'm pretty good at listening too...I do that a lot learn so much more.

I had the gladiator jumper...and I was doing that jump thingy with Nicole the other 2-year old teacher...and a LOT of kids were wanting to come inside to jump...dispite being super hot. I had a lot of fun inside the jumping house myself too...I felt like a kid all over again!

I met Nicole's kids...she has three with her youngest being nine months old...she is the cutest little thing ever! Made me miss "my" little girls back in Cali. I can't wait to see them again! But Nicole's baby she is sooooo happy, always smiling and laughing and cooing, and I got to hold her...I miss infants!! :)

I got to meet a lot of the parents from the other preschools and just meet a lot more people. Afterwards we walked around the place to check it out...there were a lot of booths, we even got this one guys card who could help us with wedding stuff. [There is this couple who wants to do the whole 1000 cranes origami thingy...and my sister has been searching for someone who could do that! And we found someone! Yay!]

It was a good day. Hot...but all in all, a day that I met a lot of people and make more friends. Yes, I was disappointed that I didn't get to go to Queen's park to do my running and swimming...but that's okay...I can always make up this week at Kailua Beach instead...maybe Lanikai...oh well, I'm surrounded by beaches, I can take my pick...but I do like Queen's park...oh well.
SOOOOOOOOO many people!!! From all over! Including ALASKA!!! That must have been a shock to them coz it was pretty hot that day!
I love this town. It's such a family town and everyone is SO nice here! It's a great place to live, and I wouldn't mind raising my kids here...IF ever I decide to have kids! :)

"We are driven by five genetic needs: survival, love and belonging, power, freedom and FUN."- William Glasser

Monday, April 18, 2011

Disney Princesses.

I will forever love the Disney Princesses. I do believe in fairytales. I am a princess. :)

"A dream is a wish your heart makes, when you're fast asleep. In dreams you will lose your heartaches. Whatever you wish for, you keep. Have faith in your dreams, and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through. No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish will come true."-Cinderella

Toddler Birthdays.

Friday, April 15, 2008 two very special boys were born to two happy couples. Three years later I had the privilege to celebrate with them in my preschool classroom. What. A. Day.

I knew ahead of time that the other teacher wasn't going to be there. She had told me that she was going to take a day to spend with her baby daughter. Of all days, she had to choose April 15. It's okay. I got this. At least I hope that I had it! *laughs*

My main concern was how was I going to handle 13 individual toddlers, in a closed room, with my sub-aid, while it was raining outside that were high on sugar?! Yep, of all hot days last week, it chose to rain on April 15.

One little boy bought had just gotten back from Disneyland [all Hawaiian-born child, so it seems, sees Disneyland as the land of milk and honey.] So he brought in mickey mouse themed, home-made cupcakes with cream cheese frosting and spam masubi. The masubi was yummy and so were the funfetti cupcakes, but it seemed that the frosting was double the size of the actual cupcake! He also brought in a lot of fun goodie-bags for everyone.

The other little boy brought a cupcake cake. No, that was not a mistake, it was a cupcake least 24 cupcakes standing together and three inches of pure icing gluing all the little cupcakes together.

It had to right after they ate their first batch of cupcakes, they had all this sugar bouncing around inside of them, they had to confined in the room. I did a lot of action songs with them...lots of marching, jumping, energy consuming action songs. We barely got though art, because they were unable to sit still. And all this from the first set of cupcakes...which I had scraped off as much icing as I could.

It had to rain the second time too after they ate their second batch of cupcakes, but at least that was for the last snack period right before they were suppose to go up to the playground to wait for their parents to pick them up. They didn't get to go up, they had to stay in the room again and just fun exercises for them to do...[act out the life cycle of a butterfly, jump like a frog, a bunny, a kangaroo...ect.]

But all in all, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I couldn't be upset with them for the extra energy they had...but it sure was a Friday that's for sure!!!

To my two little cutenesses...happy birthday! I can't wait to see what life has planned out for you! *hugs*
"All your dreams can come true if you have the courage to pursue them." -Walt Disney

Military Dad.

I know I haven't been posting as much as I should, but I will update everything soon. But I had to write this  moment now, before I forget. I don't want to forget. I have this little sweetheart that I call my "ballerina girl." Everyday, she tells me that she dreams to be a ballerina and she twirls and dances for me, and she loves to show me her "new move" and she makes me smile.

Last Thursday, I was standing next to the gate to make sure that the children wouldn't run out when then see their parents instead of waiting for them to come up the hill to get them. I had a crowd of children surrounding me, and my little ballerina girl was holding my finger twirling round and a ballerina. I saw her mom walking up to the gate with another person. I nodded hello to the mom, and told ballerina girl, sweetie your mom is here.

The reason I have to stand next to the gate is because the children get so excited to see their parents drive up and park that they run out to meet them. We don't want that. Also, a lot of them like to get the clipboards for their parents/guardians to sign them out. My little ballerina girl is no different. When I told her that her mom was here, she quickly stopped her twirling and looked for her mom, when her face lit up. "DADDY!" She was too excited to even hold the clipboard that I handed her because she was just jumping up and down, "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! You came back! You came back!! Look Aunty Chartee, my daddy! He's my daddy! My daddy is back."

Not only did my heart smile, but I felt tears flood my eyes. Good thing I had my sunglasses on. By the time her parents were up on the "hill" I was able to get ahold of myself. The mom explained to me that the little girl's dad is in the military and just came back from being deported. He had been gone for several months, and he had wanted to come pick up his daughter from preschool.

I had to look away for several seconds when he picked her up and hugged her...after a few moments, she brought him all over the playground introducing her "daddy" to everyone. All the kids that gathered around, all the teachers...and she twirled. That happy, little girl twirled and twirled for her daddy.

I have great respect for all those military men and women fighting for our country. I thank them and appreciate everything they do for me. They don't have to do it, but they do...and they don't even know me. Maybe they are not fighting specifically with me in mind, but they are as a general thing...and I admire, respect, and thank you.
"No greater love than this, that you should lay down your life for someone such as me; I'd spend a lifetime wondering why the beauty of heaven is here in my heart, and I know there can be, no greater love...than this."-Rachel Lampa, No Greater Love

Monday, April 11, 2011

One More.

I so love working with kids. I love it so very much! Every morning I get greeted with hugs and stories...and I get to teach through play every day...It's a lot of fun...and I love it a lot. As I walk up to the school, the little ones out playing on the playground and they can see me, and even if I don't feel like getting up early in the morning...all those thoughts disappear when I see a lot of them running up to the fence to great me morning.

When I leave, I am bombarded in hugs as I make way slowly out the gate. Today, my "heart smile" came because one of my little preschoolers kept holding out his arms and you can barely make out "one more, please" as I was leaving the playground to walk home. "One more, please" with the cutest look on his I open the gate one more time and bend down to give him "one more" hug.

"If you haven't time to respond to a tug at your pants leg, your schedule is too crowded."-Robert Brault

Sister Celebration.

For my sister's birthday we hung out with friends and for dinner we went to the best Thai restuarant [my opinion] on the island!! I would recommend people go to Siam Garden Cafe if they like Thai food, even if you don't like Thai food, you should go there! It's so yummy and you will probably fall in love with the place like I did!

My sister didn't know where we were going, but she knew that we were going somewhere. She kept trying to guess where...but we wouldn't confirm where we were going. Tracy and Kaleo were at our house after church...where they had "ambushed" her with silly string! [I wasn't there coz I don't go to church anymore.] *laughs* But they went home early because they wanted to get the cake and their presents for her. [These pictures are from Tracy]

She opened her present from her husband...and it was SO good that I didn't get her that...because I was so thinking about getting something similar...and then she would have two and that would be a problem...and he got her beautiful roses! [These pictures are from my sister]

I didn't want to bring my present for her to the restaurant coz it was a HUGE picture frame I brought the small gag gifts that I got her...her favorite candy, gummies and panda [chocolate-filled cracker stuff]...but the restaurant was super fun and I'm glad that I got to spend her birthday with her. [Pictures from Tracy.]

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Adam: The Last Supper.

The day before Adam left on April 08 [yes, my sister was upset that he left a day before her birthday!], we all got together to eat at the Side Street Inn in Kapahulu. The food was wonderful, and I would TOTALLY recommend people to go there. The costumer service was super nice and the foot was need I say again WONDERFUL! Adam was pretty bummed that that was our first time going there since he ended up really liking the place, so he said that when he comes back to visit, that is where we will eat again. *laughs* I am so sad that he had to leave...but I know that it's time for him to move on with his life. He wants to finish school, and so he is going to school in Nebraska! I know that it will be a different kind of life there...but I wish him the best...and I really can't wait to see him again! Thank to Tracy for the picture!

"Friends are the chocolate chips of life."

Adam: The Last Beach-day.

Every Saturday, "our group" always hang out doing whatever comes to mind...most of the time that is going to the beach and just relaxing and having fun together. It was so sad going to the beach for the last time with Adam after his last sabbath with us. We went to Manana Beach in Waimanalo...we have a lot of fun memories with him here...and I can't wait until he comes back. I'm going to super miss him a lot. Thank you to my sister, Faith for the pictures.
Yes, it was not as sunny, but the water was still warm. Not many people were out and we had a lot of fun as always.

*laughs* Adam's coconut bra!

My friends are such dorks! And I love them lots!

My younger brother and Adam being dorks. *laughs*

"I hope we'll be friends forever, together we'll always be. I don't think you understand just how much you mean to me. And one day when we part our ways, we'll think back to the past and think about how happy we are 'cause our friendship will always last."-Bridget Davis

Adam: The Last Sabbath.

I know that I haven't posted in awhile, so I'm trying to catch up with it all! *laughs* But my dear friend, Adam moved back to the mainland after serving in the Navy for 6 years. On April 02, Adam came to church for the last time. I don't normally go to church anymore, but I went with him this last time. I fist met him at Waimanalo Church. No, I take that back; we went to the same school in California, but he is 5 years younger than me, so I don't really, really remember him...I got pretty close to him here in Hawaii, and even though I've only known him for a short time, I'm going to miss him in our group we hang out with a lot. Thank you to my sister for the pictures.

"We do not remember days; we remember moments."-Cesare Pavese, The Burning Brand

Quote Pictures.
I know that this is something that I have to follow. I know that I talk a lot...but I realize that I listen more. I feel like I'm more of an observer now...but when I'm with my family, I because that talker! *laughs* I tend to react before I think...I have to work on walking away, actually, I'm pretty at doing that when I'm angry, but I still have to work on my hyper spontaneousness!
That's why I like to wake up early on Sunday mornings to go walking with Ciccio while the rest of the  team is training for their marathon. I need to remember who I am, and not get lost in what everyone else expects me to be.
I find it so hard to let go of the past. I know that I need to work on moving on and not live in the past, because I do know that something better comes along, but its so hard to move on. But I know that I'm strong and that I CAN move on.
Oh Dr. Seuss, how I love thee! This is SO true...never change, coz you are you and nobody does you better then you!
Yeah, I know I smiling when I'm hurting, coz I don't what people to know the pain the I'm hiding under it. That doesn't make me fake...I juss think that if my smiles makes someone else who is desperate for a smile feel that much better, then I don't hurt as much.
Yep, I totally agree with this one! I think that it's universal And hugs are a good way to share it!
Really?! Seriously?! This one makes me laugh, but that is so a way coz guys can really get in their game! *laughs*