Monday, March 14, 2011

Letting go.

"Should I smile because we're friends or cry because that's all we'll ever be?!"

Letting go is and will always be hard to do. My cousin once told me that whoever I end up with will be one lucky guy coz I love deep. And she told me, be careful with your heart, you get hurt easily coz you care too much. I remember thinking, what?! Doesn't anyone?! But I can see what she is saying.

When I get with someone, I never think that we're going to break up. I only get with a guy if I can see myself with them...forever. Literally. And I know that it does take me nearly that long to get over that guy if we do break up. But I know now that I can't do that, and it's time for me to let go. I don't wait by my phone anymore waiting for his phone calls or even his texts. I don't run to the mailbox hoping that he decided to send me a surprise in the mail [he use to do that, because he knew it made me smile.] I don't wait for his knock on the door wanting to take me out just because or for his smiles when I see him. But deep down inside I still hope, does he still have some feelings for me? But I can't hold on anymore. It's time for me to let go.

I'll remember the good times that we had. I'll remember the times where he would make me smile and the surprises he would randomly think of to do because I get excited over them. I'll remember our good memories. We still talk...sometimes. He'll still texts me telling me goodnight...sometimes. He'll still call me up to tell me to have a good day...sometimes. But it's not the same anymore and yes, it's time for me to let go.

It was good while it lasted, but it's time for me to let go. It's hard...it's never easy...but something like this should never be easy...but it sucks to go through.

"If you love something set them free; if it comes back it's yours, if it doesn't, it never was."