Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Oh no...!!!


It’s already one minute past 10.pm and I juss got back from class…I didn’t get to go jogging, because it’s already past curfew, and I can’t go back on campus anymore to go jogging (there is no where to jog around my apartment complex and stuff) and so I’m kinda wind up and stuff…I was outside for a bit, the air is cooler outside and the clouds are moving fast so I can glimpse at the stars. I really wanna see the big dipper…but oh well, I know that it’s there…somewhere…

“I don’t wanna close my eyes, I don’t wanna fall asleep, coz I’ll miss you baby, and I don’t wanna miss a think, coz even when I dream again, the sweetest dream will never to, coz I’ll still miss you, baby….”
My friend asked me how it was possible to stay happy all the time…my goodness, if only he know what I was really feeling inside…and I said this, that at any given time a person can feel a lot of emotions at the same time, ya?! Well, whenever I’m sad, I know that there is something to be happy for. Whenever I’m happy, I’m also sad, because for one thing, I’m missing everyone that I have come across in my life that I can’t see at the moment, and that’s enough to make someone sad! *laughs* But I told him that I choose to be happy…and so whenever there are times that I feel some negative emotions, I juss think of those things that can make me happy. Because I don’t believe in being fake, no?! And so I don’t ever be fake if I can help it, and so it’s like this…even though I could be sad, there is always a reason why I can also be happy. So I choose to juss think of those things that make me happy. Yeah, given, I am only human (o0O0oO…it’s already late now, and I need to go to sleep, Achalu came over and we were talking and then my cousin came over and he joined our conversation, hooked me and Achalu up with movies and then la-dee-da-dee-da and so yeah, let me write this really quick and then I gosta make my way to my bed and get my beauty rest, ya?! *laughs*) so there are times where I am also overwhelmed by my negative feelings and I feel like I am juss so sad, I always tell myself, that if I can’t find a reason to smile any longer, then that is when I have lost, and I don’t ever wanna loose, so I juss find some way to release my negative energy…hence the jogging…and working out…it’s like that kasi…I’ll go jogging so that I can use my negative energy in that way…and I won’t have to keep it all in…and then I have those awesome people who can see past my smiles (even though I am smiling for realz, man!) and actually see that I’m going through something not good…and then they can always make me smile…
So I really wanted to go to the city again this weekend…I really needed to juss loose myself in crazy madness and juss go at it, but then it was ruined because we have this humiliation tradition here in this school and that’s called “P.E. night” and it’s juss horrible like whoa, and my class wants to practice for it SATURDAY NIGHT?! Oh okay…so yeah, given, we haven’t practiced before and we need too, but come on now! Saturday night?! What is that…I wanted to go to the city…why couldn’t we have juss practice on Sunday or something…not on a Saturday night!! I guess I can still be in the city Friday night…and I like it better that way, but I need my whole day Saturday to yeah…oh well, maybe it’s good now that I don’t have to go there all the time…but it’s not like I even go all the time, I had stopped for a long time, and now it’s not even that bad, man! So don’t look or judge me…I’m actually laughing and having fun and not stressed out over school for once, and I need to take a break from school…it’s getting way to much, the teachers are making it way to much and I jusss wanna get it over and done with already, man! Oh well….
 I wanna eat pizza. Yeah, I know that’s pretty random, but my friend Matt told me that my cousin was in Yellow Cab….with two girls…and when Achalu came over he said that he saw Eddie too…my goodness, why do these people thing that they have to report to me my cousin’s whereabouts?! *laughs* well, I can understand Achalu telling me…but yeah the other people…(jajaja…Matt, don’t get me wrong, I still love you! *laughs)…and my cousin came here and explained to me as well why he was at Yellow Cab…but now I wanna go to Yellow Cab and get me some pizza! *laughs* I want me some crazy bread from Little Ceasar’s too! *laughs* yeah, I miss it.
Well, I know that this is really short, but I really gotta go now…I’m getting really, super, duper tired now. (And JA! Achalu DID go to sleep! He told me that he was gonna stay up and juss study! But when Eddie left, I saw that his light was off…oh well, I knew that he was tired, I’m glad that he went to sleep for a bit…) And it’s my turn to call it a night. Goodnight and sweetdreams! I miss you all so much and I can’t wait to see you all again. Lubshoo muchoness!!
*hugs and kisses*
“Never regret anything that made you smile.”

[Transferred from my myspace blog]