Saturday, May 10, 2008

I wish you enough...

ood-morning and Happy Sabbath everyone! Imma bout to go to church with Eddie…I juss gotta wait for him to text me so that we can be on our way. I stopped going to church again…it's so easy to be discouraged here…but I have Eddie (and another friend [Chris]) who keeps me strong in the faith and pushes me to continue going to church and so that's good, and I appreciate them more then they will ever know…(I doubt they read my blogs though, so they won't read this anyways…but I tell them all the time! *smiles*).

Hm…well, I've been getting out more, juss because I don't like being alone and I'm making new friends…which sorta in a weird way scares me and makes me sad, because I'm making great friends and a lot of friends…and then in the end imma have to leave them. Gosh, saying goodbye sucks a lot…but you know…my friend, 'Rara sent me this forward a long time ago…and imma post it up here right quick…

"Recently I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport. They had announced the departure. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said, "I love you and I wish you enough". The daughter replied, "Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom". They kissed and the daughter left. The mother walked over to the window where I was seated. Standing there I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, ?"Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?". Yes, I have," I replied. "Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever good-bye?". "I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is - the next trip back will be for my funeral," she said. "When you were saying goodbye, I heard you say, 'I wish you enough'. May I ask what that means?". She began to smile. "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone". She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more. ?"When we said , 'I wish you enough', we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them". Then turning toward me, she shared the following as if she were reciting it from memory.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear. 

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.
I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye. 

She then began to cry and walked away.
They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them but then an entire life to forget them." 

And there is a line in that story that makes me realize something…and that line is, "I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye." And yes, I realize that in order to say hello, you gotta meet a lot of people, well, you don't really need to meet a lot of people…but whatever…it's still good, ya?!
I've been talking to my sister, not a lot…but more…and she knows that I have problems saying goodbye…and how for awhile I didn't even want to make any new friends…because it was so hard to say goodbye to my roomies, Jyn and Joy…I miss them so much…I will always miss them…gosh, juss talking about them right now makes me miss them and tear up…because they were only in my life for about 4 years…but having them move back to Thailand and knowing that I can't go to them when I need to…kills me…it killed me to say bye to my family when I left home last year…and saying bye to my two "sisters/roomies/friends" was something that I didn't know was going to be so hard. When you live with someone for so long, you get used to having them around…and it's not that you even take them for granted…because you know that eventually they would have to go back home, and  I would have to go back home…but then…you don't really think about it…and when the time comes…you know that no matter how much you prepare yourself, it's still hard to say "bye." Anyways…you all know me…it's impossible for me NOT to make any new friends or meet new people or go out and socialize…I'mma people person…and it's boring to juss stay home and do nothing, ya?! *laughs*

It's funny because me and Eddie were talking about things that we missed at home…and we had this whole conversation about cereal…*laughs* So random, I know…but seriously, this country is NOT a cereal eating country…far from it! One of the questions that I get here from the natives is do we really eat cereal with milk in the morning for breakfast "like in the movies?" Uhm…that would be a YES! And we were naming all the types of cereals that we liked and stuff and juss naming all the cereals that we can remember…and the ones that we really not like and stuff like that…it was interesting…

And then another topic was, different breakfast foods that we missed. Oh goodness, I love breakfast food…maybe not at breakfast…but I like breakfast food. *laughs* Here, their breakfast food is the same as their lunch and dinner…all their food is the same here…there is no difference…and yeah, I like variety in my food and stuff…and being here makes me seem like a picky eater…but I don't think that I am…it's juss here they juss have the food that I don't like…at home, they have so much variety that I can avoid eating the food that I don't like. Oh well…yeah, we have fun conversations and stuff…jejeje…

Oh, Eddie juss texted me…I gotta go! Love you all and miss you so much!!!

*hugs and kisses*

[Transferred from my myspace blog]