Monday, October 30, 2006 here i am, sitting outside...and there are misquitoes buzzing all around me...i'm here with my sweater on...but i'm in basketball my poor lets are being eaten alive. i'm talking to my friend whom i havent' talked to in a long time...dispite the fact my housemaids wants me to come inside to eat with them, kasi it's dinner time.

I'm also on, kasi i miss my home, and my family so much. It was my daddy's birthday yesterday...and i know that today is harry's birthday...and so on the off chance that he ever reads this..."happy birthday harry!" know, i watch this one movie, and in it...there was this young girl who was dying...and this other girl asked the girl if she was scared of death..this dying girl was like 12 years old...and she said something that made me think. She said that she was not scared of dying...she was scared of what she was gonna miss out on when she was gone.

I think that's sorta the same with me. i'm not scared of death...i'm juss scared of what i'm gonna miss out when i'm gone. But you know its sorta like that now. i feel like i'm dead to everyone at home. and the worst part is, at times i hear what IS going on, and what i AM missing out on. so i guess that's the worst part of being away from home. it's like your dead to your home, but you still hear news of what your missing out. whereas, when your don't really find out what your missing until you go to heaven and find out.
true...i'm having so much fun here! i sang at this awesome mall place...i'm making new friends, i'm doing what my parents want me to be doing, i'm going out and helping those who aren't as well off as i am, i'm doing things that i know that i can be proud of, but i miss him. i know that i'm missing out on so many things. i'm missing out on my baby neices growing up...i'm missing out on weddings, on parties, on birthdays, on holidays. all the sports games all the things that i know that all of you guys are doing and having fun....i'm not even allowed to go out and trick-or-treat! but i'm not complaining...i'm juss sad. so sad. i miss it at home. but you know...what is worst? i know that when i'm at home, i miss it here. i miss it here so much...i wish that i were rich enough to have my own plane to fly back and forth whenever i want.

eww..i think the cat took a SH! smells like SH!T!!! the way...the cats here are different know how at home they dig a hole and shit in it, then bury it? well, over here, they don't. they juss shit wherever they feel like it. sometimes right outside my room window...and i literally cry from the's terrible! but lucky roomates have a really good sense of if they say they smell something bad...i hold my breath...cover my nose...or something...and if i'm lucky it will pass...:)

oh my goodness! there was this time where me and eddie and our other friend john..who is also a balikbayan, were in this class called asain civilization....and we were talking, then all of a sudden this really bad smell came to were sitting by the window. john was falling asleep, and he even woke was funny...then the wind would blow it away, and me and eddie could breath again, and then it would come again...oh, its not as funny if you weren't there...but if you were there...oh gosh!

i have a lot more stories to tell you, but i need to go for now since my roomie wants to go online...and i like to peace out yo' i love you all and please know that i miss you...

(TAMARA!!! where are you!!!?!)

[Transferred from my myspace blog]